™FR3ESTYLEKING'S OFFICIAL JOKEBOOK

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People Who Should've Won This Years Nobel Prize

1.) Britney Spears & Eminem
Who, combined, have written more books than they''ve read.

2.) Dr. Phil Mcgraw
Who has managed to convince millions of women to buy his self-help books, despite the fact that his most hight-profile patient, Oprah Winfrey, is an overweight woman with serious commitment issues.

3.) America''s Oil Companies
For a lifetime body of work proving that oil and water don''t mix.

4.) Yasser Arafat & Ariel Sharon
For those 2 consecutive days last March when no Israelis or Palestinians killed each other.

5.) Bill Gates
For creating the X-Box and convincing Americans that their children need a $200 video game system during a recession.

6.) The Editors of Maxim
For managing to create 300 magazine pages a month using no other subjects besides beer and models.

7.) Jared
Of the Subway Sandwich fame, whose claim of losing hundreds of pounds and achieving optimum health by eating nothing but oversized, greasy heroes was questioned by no one.

8.) Jennifer Lopez
Who, in conjunction with DuPont, developed a synthetic fabric capable of containing her ass.

9.) That 300 Pound Guy
Who always manages to jam himself into the coach seat right next to yours on coast to coast flights.

10.) Glaxo
Who has managed to make "loose stools" a side effect of every one of the drugs it produces.
 
Adam & Eve

After spending time with Eve, Adam was walking in the Garden with God. Adam told God how much the woman means to him and how blessed he feels to have her. Adam began to ask questions about her.
Adam: Lord, Eve is beautiful. Why did you make her so beautiful?

God: So you will always want to look at her.

Adam: Lord, her skin is so soft. Why did you make her skin so soft?

God: So you will always want to touch her.

Adam: She always smells so good. Lord, why did you make her smell so good?

God: So you will always want to be near her.

Adam: That's wonderful Lord, and I don't want to seem ungrateful, but why did you make her so stupid?

God: So she would love you.
 
damn

The CIA had an opening for an assassin.

The CIA had an opening for an assassin. After all of the background checks, interviews, and testing were done there were three finalists — two men and one woman. For the final test, the CIA agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.
“We must know that you will follow your instructions, no matter what the circumstances. Inside this room you will find your wife sitting in a chair. You have to kill her.” The first man said.“You can’t be serious. I could never shoot my wife,”

The agent replies, “Then you’re not the right man for this job."

The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about five minutes. Then the agent came out with tears in his eyes. “I tried, but I can’t kill my wife.” The agent replies, “You don’t have what it takes. Take your wife and go home.”

Finally, it was the woman’s turn. Only she was told to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one shot after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman. She wiped the sweat from her brow and said, “You guys didn’t tell me the gun was loaded with blanks. So I had to beat him to death with the chair.”
 
Yo Momma......

Let's Keep this thread going! I'll Start 😛


1.) Yo mama is so fat, she wore leather pants to a party and when she bent over to pick up a penny, people sat on her booty thinking it was a couch.
 
OH DAMN! LMAO!!!!! This ain't even right! 😛

Yo mama's house is so dusty the roaches ride around on dune buggies. :stoned
 
LMAO Destiny!!!!!

Yo mama's so big, when you climb on top of her your ears pop.

Yo mama's so stupid, she stands up on an empty bus.

Yo mama's got so many teeth missing, it looks like her tongue is in jail.

:lol :lol :lol :lol
 
i dont know if this one applies but here goes

i went to visit yo mamma, i stepped on a cigarrette, and she said "who turned off the heat?"
 
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought a quarterback was a refund.

Yo mama's so ugly, she threw a boomerang and it wouldn't even come back.

Yo mama's so old, her birth-certificate expired.

:stoned
 
YO MAMA'S SO NASTY,WHEN I WENT TO UR HOUSE FOR DINNER AND ASK WHAT WE WERE HAVIN ,SHE HOPPED UP ON THE TABLE SPREAD HER LEGS AND SAID "FISH OR CRAPS TAKE UR PICK."
 
1.Yo mama's so fat, last time she went to Sea World Shamu got a hard on.
2.Yo mama's so ugly, people at the circus pay money not to see her.
3.Yo mama's so stupid, her idea of safe sex is locking the car doors.
4.Yo mama's so stupid, I saw her walking down the street yelling into an
envelope, asked what she was doing, and she said sending a voice mail.
 
yo mama so fat, her belly botton got an echo.

yo mama so fat ,her nick name "Dam"

yo mama so fat during summer time she sells shade.

yo mama house so small u have 2 eat a large pizza outside.
 
Yo mama is so skinny...when she swallowed a cherry she thought she was pregnant.

-ant
 
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