The step son!

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Dave G>

Dave G>

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I've been with my girl for about 2.5 years and she has a son who is 16. We always get along and I've been producing his group since we met. There are alot of times where he is disrespectful to his family amd I told him over and over to not do that. I take it personal because I don't have a family and to see someone take advantage and treat people like sh*t bothers me. We had small time arguments and lately he has begun to challenge me. Now, I'm old school and I grew up in the BX, so I'm not about to have no kid disrespect me like that. Well, yesturday he started to bitch about the bathroom because I was fixing the light and the power was off so, he said something and when I asked him who he was talking to he said his grandmother. So I told him not to talk to her that way and he got loud with me... So, I got even louder and I told him he was not going to disrespect anyone in this house anymore. And I pointed the finger and he told me to get out his face and he got in mine and he ended up grabbing me. I put him to the ground and picked him back up and told him to man up since he's so tough (he is a big kid) but, after I felt real bad. I think I did what ?I had to do to get my point across. I know his mom is real tight about his, but part of it is her fault. She rarely redirects him and his father is not always around. Form the attitude after, I think he'll watch his mouth around the house, but this is not a situation that I ever saw comming.

Sorry this was so long.
 
I know its never easy dealing with stepkids maybe you should sit him down and talk to him and see whats bothering him maybe he's lashing out for some attention you know since his real dad is never around. I wish you the best of luck dave.
 
Melly22 said:
I know its never easy dealing with stepkids maybe you should sit him down and talk to him and see whats bothering him maybe he's lashing out for some attention you know since his real dad is never around. I wish you the best of luck dave.
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That's the thing, I sat him down a million times and showed him support, but he says we don't understand. If any one understands it's me. But, the way he disrespects is like we're his problem. It's just that people around the house show that he runs sh*t. I don't play that.
 
Dave G> said:
That's the thing, I sat him down a million times and showed him support, but he says we don't understand. If any one understands it's me. But, the way he disrespects is like we're his problem. It's just that people around the house show that he runs sh*t. I don't play that.
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i feel you on that maybe its just the hormones of a teenager we were all there once where i would disrespect my parents (i wish with all my heart i could take it back) 🙁
 
My husband and I both feel that you did right. Children can't disrespect when they feel like it. Doesn't work like that. I'm old school when it comes to that. My own teenage kids have tested me like that and I back slapped them so hard that they know better now!

Yes you feel bad but your girl has to understand your disposition too.
 
I was a Stepdaughter...It wasnt easy wanting my Dad around and having someone else there. There were alot of times I lashed out as a Teenager and as Melly I wish I could take it all back. What U did wasnt wrong at all. My step father Never had strong words with me. He would just fight with my Mom about it. For that I never respected him. But Now My mom is not around and I relize He is who has always been there. My real Father Passed when I was a teenager. To me Now My Step Father has always been my Dad. Most of all Because he stuck around and Loved my Mom.
Time Heals all. Stand Strong. Respect will have no choice but to be there.
Sorry for rambling.
 
I give you credit Dave. You have accepted this child as your own and that is something that allot of men (or women for that matter) would do.

It's not easy to accept someone else's kid(s) and you have. If your girlfriend doesn't mind you disciplining her son, then I don't see a problem. All kids at some time or another act out and it's the parents responsibility to straighten them out.

She needs to help in this department a little also.

What you did seems to be something that should have been done a long time ago. If that was your child, you would have reacted the same way so never feel guilty for disciplining him.

I hope it all works out for you.
 
It could be as well that he's having probs outside the house and it's easier to take it out on someone at home.
He's at an age when he thinks he knows it all. I'm sure we all did. Hopefully he won't do it again- and I don't think you were inthe wrong for doing what u did..If she has a problem with it- then I think u 2 should discuss it calmy and civilzed.
 
Thanks for the support, I think he got the message because he's on a different page today. I felt bad, but I know I did right. Thanks!
 
The mother have to talk to him .. She have to put her foot down and tell him as it is .. He have to understand that no matter what he have to respect you cuz you are the men of the house no matter what ... Plus if you treat him right what the hell he wants someone to take all his sh*t ... All I say is she have to talk to him first it shouldn't of never got of hand like that ... I hope things work out for ya and no you did right but I think she have to support you also in what you say and have a lil talk with her son ....
 
I was thinking about this and I realized that if it gets to that point again, I'm out! I can't risk losing my daughter because of a fight with a kid. Let's see if we can deescalate a problem .
 
you were rght for showing him some force. he seems to have problems that he is not letting you in on. his mother should ground him. i wish you luck.
 
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