Ru Paul, Bill Gates, and Roger Ebert are all struck by lightning on the same day. All three find themselves in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. They start begging him to give them another chance at life. St. Peter agrees but on one condition: they each have to give up something they truly enjoy.
Ru Paul says, "I really love men, but I will give up screwing around with them."
Bill Gates says, "I really love money, but I will give up all the money I have."
Ebert says." I really love food, but I'll give up pizza."
Soon, all three find themselves back on Earth. They start walking down street feeling very grateful. Suddenly, Ebert spots a pizzeria. He smells the aroma and can't help himself — he runs in there and eats a slice of pizza. POOF! He disappears.
Ru Paul and Bill Gates are astonished and agree that that won't happen to them. So they resume walking down the street when Bill Gates spots a shiny, new quarter. He thinks that if he picks it up, he can found a new company and become fabulously wealthy again. He bends down to pick up the quarter and POOF! Ru Paul disappears.
1.) Each player shall furnish his own equipment for play.
2.) Play must be permitted by the owner of the hole.
3.) Unlike outdoor golf, the object is to get the club in the hole and keep the balls out.
4.) For most effective play, the club should have a firm shaft. Course owners are permitted to check shaft stiffness before play begins.
5.) Course owners reserve the right to restrict club length to avoid damage to the hole.
6.) The object of the game is to take as many strokes as necessary until the course owner is satisfied that play is completed. Failure to do so may result in being denied permission to play the course again.
7.) It is considered bad form to begin playing the hole immediately upon arrival at the course. The experienced player will normally take time to admire the entire course with special attention to well-formed bunkers.
8.) Players are cautioned not to mention other courses they have played, or are currently playing, to the owner of the course being played. Angry course owners have been known to damage players' equipment for this reason.
9.) Players are encouraged to bring proper rain gear for their own protection.
10.) Players should ensure that the match has been properly scheduled, particularly when a new course is being played for the first time. Previous players have been known to become irate if they discover someone else playing on what they considered to be a private course.
11.) Players should not assume a course is in shape for play at all times. Some players may be embarrassed if they find the course to be temporarily under repair. Players are advised to be extremely tactful in this situation. More advanced players will find alternative means of play when this is the case.
12.) The course owner is responsible for manicuring and pruning any bush around the hole to allow for improved viewing of alignment with, and approach to the hole.
13.) Players are advised to obtain the course owner's permission before attempting to play the back nine.
14.) Slow play is encouraged. However, players should be prepared to proceed at a quicker pace, at least temporarily, at the course owner's request.
15.) It is considered outstanding performance, time permitting, to play the same hole several times in one match.