Ok..Gimme your opinion.....

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Dayer

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So...

Off & on I have been seeing someone since April of 1998. I wont mention names because I know this person is going to read this & most likely make themselves known at some point.

A few months here, don't talk for a few months. You know how it is. I had issues (like a husband) said person had issues (like me having a husband)

Anyways, even though a lot of time has passed, love never died, at least not for me. Although I tried to hide especially when this person's newest g/f came along back in January.

So...my ex-husband & I finally split up in March & I moved back home. Now...my home is oh...5 or 6 blocks from this person's house. So....do the math.

Anyways...this is what I want your opinion on. If you are completely in love with someone to the point where you would literally do anything for them, & that person swears that they love you too but still has a g/f (even though they hardly see each other) would you stay?

If you were told to be patient & everything would work out....

would you stay, not hooking up with anybody else just to prove that you love this person?

or....

would you run, afraid that you will end up being played for stupid, even though you know that would hurt you 1,000 times more than dealing with the situation?
 
YO DAYER DONT DO ANYTHING IF THAT PERSON SAYS ITS MEANT TO BE THEN LET THAT PERSON JUST COME TO YOU

ITS GOTTA BE LIKE HOW YOU GUYS FIRST MET

AND YO TAKE CARE OF YOURS AND JUST FLOW WIT IT
IM NOT SAYIN WAIT FOR HIM TILL ITS DONE CUZ YOU NEVER KNOW IF IT IS DONE ENJOY YOURELF CARE FOR THE PERSON IF THATS WHAT YOU FEEL BUT DONT STOP WHAT YOU GOT FOR THAT PERSON BE PATIENT ONCE AGAIN TOLD YOU PATIENCE
 
MAMA, YOU ALREADY DEALT WITH YOUR SITUATION WETHER IT WAS FOR PERSONAL REASON OR TO PROVE THAT YOU LOVE THIS PERSON, NOW IT'S UP TO THE OTHER HALF TO CHANGE THE SITUATION AND GET TO THE LEVEL THAT YOUR AT.. IF YOU ARE HAPPY WITH THE ARRANGMENT THAN COOLZZZZZZ BUT, IF YOUR NOT SATISFIED IN ANY WAY EVEN THOUGH YOU LOVE THEN, THINK LONG AND HARD BEFORE STAYING AROUND FOR THE END RESULT
 
my advice is to bounce on that situation cause those types of relationships RARELY work out the way you want them to.... speaking from a man's point of view, it would not surprise me if he's trying to have his cake and eat it too, meaning he'll keep you around since youre so close, get what he needs, but with no intentions of leaving his GF... i think its safe to say we're famous for preferring to have that "rainy day" option and if you have any issues with being the other woman, it's time to move on... it may hurt initially, but if u get played down the road it'll hurt more cause you had the opportunity to skip town and didnt..... my $.02, best of luck in whatever you decide....
 
they love you too but still has a g/f

IN MY OPINION, that line right there should tell u that this person doesnt love you as much as they claim. if they did, they would've left their g/f for you in a heartbeat. whats the point of staying with that girl (who they hardly see) if they "love" you?

u know mama? 😉
 
MAMA I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN TOLD NEVER STOP YOUR LIFE FOR ANYONE, I WS IN A SITUATION SOME WHAT SIMULAR WHERE SOMEONE KEPT TELLING ME THINGS WOULD CHANGE ETC BUT THEY DIDNT SO I MOVED ON I COULDNT SIT AND WAIT FOR THEM NO MATTER HOW MUCH THEY WERE FEELING ME BECUASE IN THE END IT WAS ALL BS AND NOW I FOUND SOMEONE SPECIAL . I WOULD SAY DONT STOP YOUR LIFE FOR ANYONE LET THIS PERSON FIND YOU WHEN THEY HAVE LET THAT OTHER PERSON OUT OF THERE LIVES NEVER LET ANYONE PUT YOU SECOND YOU SHOULD ALWAYS BE # 1, AND I KNOW AT TIMES IT IS EASIER SAID TEHN DONE BUT WHEN A PERSON TRULY LOVES YO THEY DONT LET ANYTHING GET IN THE WAY OF THAT. SO LET THIS PERSON DO WHAT THEY GO TO DO AND WHEN YOU ARE TRULY THE ONLY ONE FOR THEM THEN LET THEM COME FOR YOU IN THE MEAN TIME DO YOUR THING MAMA🙂
 
AHEM

NICELY SAID SEXY!!! I AGREE 100% THERES A BILLION MEN/WOMEN OUT THERE WE SHOULD NEVER LET ONE BE THE RESULT OF THE MOVES WE MAKE, ESPECIALLY MATTERS OF THE HEART
 
But its like this....

I can't feel anybody else. I have tried, believe me.

And its not like I never hurt this person before, you know?

And I have tried the "now or never" threat & that really only makes things worse.

Maybe this person will realize how much I car & what I have gone through to "prove" myself.

The reason for being with the g/f as far as I know is because they're trying to break it off slowly so as not to come flat out & say "By the way I've been sleeping with Dawn for xx amount of time."

Its just very frustrating.

And....its not a guy. Not that most of you cf peeps know, but I have had my fill of guys in my life.

So yeah...all of this frustration is from a girl. And part of me thinks I deserve it because when things 1st happened with her & I (way back), I was just a total bitch. I couldn't handle my sexuality & I tried very much to convince myself that it was just a fling & that I really loved John (ex-husband) which ended up hurting her, very much so. Trust me, I denied that I was "with" her for well over 2 years because I didn't want to be labelled.

And it honestly took until she walked out of my life & got herself a g/f for me to wake up & realize that I wasn't happy where I was. But...thats another story in itself.

So, maybe you'll understand why I feel like I have to deal with this. Because I'm the one that f*cked up.

But honestly, male or female love hurts the same & I am sure you can all relate to what I am going through so keep this conversation going peeps....its damn good therapy & its free

😀
 
DAMN GIRL, WELL NOW THAT YOU ADMIT THAT YOU F***ED UP, I JUST HAVE A QUESTION, WERE YOU BOTH WITH SOMEONE AT THE SAME TIME OR WAS IT JUST YOU AND YOU HAD HER ON THE SIDE, IF THAT IS THE CASE THAN I CAN UNDERSTAND WHY THE SITUATION IS THE WAY IT IS. BUT, IT STILL DOESNT MAKE WHAT SHE IS NOW DOING TO YOU RIGHT, YOU LEFT THE PERSON YOU WERE WITH AND LIKE YOU SAID YOU PROVED YOURSELF AND HAVE TRIED AND ARE TRYING YOUR BEST TO COPE WITH THE SITUATION, JUST BECAUSE YOU F***ED UP DOESNT MEAN IT MAKES WHAT SHE IS PUTTING YOU THROUGH RIGHT. SHE WAS OBVOIUSLY WILLING TO PUT HER TIME INTO IT BEFORE AND NOW THAT SHE HAS A G/F SHE SHOULDNT LOVE YOU ANY LESS. LOVE IS LOVE DAWN, AND IF SHE FEELS FOR YOU WHAT YOU FEEL FOR HER THAN, SHE NEEDS TO CUT HERSELF OUT OF THAT WOMENS LIFE, IF NOT YOU SHOULDNT FEEL LIKE YOU HAVE TO PUT UP WITH IT, MISTAKES IN THE PAST SHOULD BE LEFT IN THE PAST. IF YOUR STARTING OVER, START COMPLETELY OVER.
 
Dawn.....

I think you should do your thing and TRY to find someone new, there are alot of girls out theere to be sticking around, you love her that is fine, but tell her until she is ready to be with you and only you, to leave you alone, cause you are only getting emotionally messed up ma really...

Renee
 
AIGHT COOL NOW THAT YOU HAVE SHARED THE REST OF THE STORY WITH US IT HELPS TO DO OUR BEST TO HELP YOU. MAN WOMAN WHATEVER THE CASE IS ITS LOVE POINT BLANK AND I CAN TELL YOU FROM EXPIERIENCE WHEN YOU TRY TO HOLD ON YOU SOMETIMES FIND YOURSELF HOLDING ON FOR ALL THE WRONG REASONS LOVE IS THE ONE THING THAT WILL BREAK YOU IF YOU LET IT GOD KNOWS I KNOW I WAS WITH MY EX FOR 8YRS AND I HELD ON FOR DEAR LIFE AND THEN I LET GO. I THOUGHT IT WAS THE RIGHT THING TO DO AND IN THE END IT DID ME MORE HARM THEN IT EVER DID ME GOOD. THEN I MET SOMEONE WHO AFTER MY EX I TOOK SERIOUSLY FOR THE FIRST TIME AND AS I SAID ABOVE HE SAID THINGS WOULD CHANGE BUT THEY DIDNT THEN THE TRUTH CAME OUT AT THE END I KNEW I COULDNT HOLD ON I HAD BEEN THERE DONE THAT SO I KEPT IT MOVING. WHAT I AM SAYING IS AIGHT YOU WAS WITH THIS FEMALE AND HURT HER AND NOW YOU THINK THAT BY WAITING FOR HER TO LET GO OF THAT PERSON SHE IS WITH ITS OK BECAUSE YOU HURT HER ONCE BEFORE, BUT IT DONT WORK LIKE THAT FOR THE SIMPLE FACT THAT NOW YOU ARE HURTING AS YOU WAIT FOR. WHEN TWO PEOPLE LOVE EACH OTHER F*** THAT THERE SHOULDNT BE ANYTHING TO STAND IN THE WAY AND IF SOMEONE GETS HURT ALONG THE WAY HEY SHIT HAPPENS WHEN TO PEOPLE LOVE EACH OTHER THAT SHOULD BE #1 NEVER PLACE IT SECOND FOR ANYONE. JUST THINK ABOUT THE PRECIOUS MOMENTS YOU ARE MISSING OUT ON AT THIS VERY MOMENT AS YOU BOTH CONTEMPLATE. LIEK I SAID NEVER STOP YOUR LIFE FOR ANYONE WHEN ITS MEANT TO BE IT IT WILL BE MAYBE NOT TODAY MAYBE NOT TOMORROW BUT IF IT IS WRITTEN THEN IT SHALL BE BEST OF LUCK NENA YOU KNOW YOU GOT YOUR CF FAM TO LOOK OUT WITH THE ADVICE 24/7 🙂
 
But Renee...

Of all the people giving me their opinions, you should understand the most.

That meaning, you should understand how badly that will backfire if I tried it.

You know how women are. Guaranteed I would only F*** myself for saying that.

Believe me, I have said something similar in the past & it does is make us not talk for a lil bit & everything starts back up.

And its not really that easy to find someone else. I mean honestly, I am far from a cutie, girls don't just fall into my lap you know?

And besides, I don't want anybody else. I just want things back the way they used to be. (well, minus the ex-hubby)

Destiny...

To answer your question, I was married, she knew that before we hooked up. She had a g/f of about 4 years & a girl on the side when we started talking.

After a few weeks, it was just me & her, and I was the only one that had someone else.

About 6 months after that she freaked that I was never going ot leave John & she left me for a girl that lives next door to my Dad (yeah that was fun visiting Dad!) & we didn't speak for a good 7 months.

Then we got back together but I was still married & things were good until I started being a c**t. Then we broke up, she found her g/f & now we've just been dating for a few months.

Except now, I have nobody else & she does

Angel...

I have no patience. I know if its meant to be it will be but honestly I am an impatient b*tch.

Trust me, this hurts more than anything but when I'm with her its perfect you know? If its just me & her. You know...thats all I want. Just to get back what I lost out on.

And I am so confused, because if I protect myself from getting hurt & run, I will f*ck myself in the end.

*sigh*



🙁
 
OMG!!NENA THE WEBS WE WEAVE!!

HOW CAN ANYONE BASE A RELATIONSHIP ON BS AND LIES? YOU BOTH WEREN'T COMPLETELY TRUE TO EACH OTHER FROM THE START. YOU WERE IN A RELATIONSHIP NOW SHE IS ECT ECT.

WHAT I SEE THAT U MIGHT'VE HAD WAS A FANTASY...LOVE IS NOT EVERYTHING..COMMUNICATION AND HONESTY PLAYS A GREAT ROLE.

I BELEIVE YOU SHOULD MOVE ON AND NOT HOLD ON TO WHAT MIGHT'VE BEEN. IF THIS PERSON IS NOT WITH YOU BY NOW, SHE WON'T BE COMPLETELY TRUE TO YOU WHEN SHE IS...

NOW YOU WANT A MONOGAMOUS RELATIONSHIP AND YOU CAN'T CAPTURE AN OLD FLAME..ALOT OF TIMES IT'S BEST TO LET THE FLAME DIE OUT AND START FRESH...TRUST ME YOUR HEART WILL HEAL.
 
Dawn,

I remember telling you that you liked girls when you were 13 or 14 & you almost threw up.

I told you weren't going to be happy with you know who, you didn't listen.

When Sammy left you the first time, I told you to forget her but she is still around.

I told you that I don't "surf the net" but you told me what you wrote here & I wanted to see for myself.

We both know I am not little or shy but I could not think of a name.

I don't know whether to call you stupid for dragging your personal life out in the open, or to call you brave for actually admitting that you fell in love with a girl.

Whatever the case, you are still my cousin & I still love you.

My advice is this:

For every good day you have, there are 2 bad ones
For every smile you crack, you shed 100 tears
For every "I love you" that she tells you, you tell her 10 times

And no Dawn, you didn't tell me that but I lived through it.

You are getting too hurt and you justify it by thinking to yourself "I hurt her 1st, I deserve this"

You don't deserve it!!!!!!!

She knew you were married before she got involved with you.

Yes, you were wrong for leading her on but now she is wrong for leading you on.

For your sake, I honestly hope that she reads this. Or else, this "coming out" would be for absolutely nothing.

I know that you love her. I know how you feel. I know that you think nothing in this world will make you happy except Sammy.

Well, I have told you before & I will tell you again. Its the virgin dilemna. She was your 1st, you wont give it up to anyone else because its "special" meanwhile she is probably banging her girlfriend every night while you are in bed crying.

I'm giving you a call tonight, I gotta snap you out of this, even if I buy the plane ticket myself.

Sammy,

If you are reading this, Dawn needs to be with a woman that will keep her happy. Do you think you're the one?

Dawn wont give me your e-mail address but I really want to talk to you & tell you a few things. Please e-mail me at cmcordo@hotmail.com

Dawn,

I promise if I talk to Sammy, I wont say anything bad. I just want to talk to her, Lesbian to Lesbian to see where her head & heart are.

You also have to understand, what I say to her stays between her & I. I wont tell you when we speak & I suggest that you don't ask.
 
HOT DAMN, AND A BAG OF DIDDLEY WOP. THAT IS SOME STRAIT UP LOVIN ADVICE, GIRL YOUR COUSIN OBVIOSELY LOVES YOU TO DEATH AND IS LOOKING OUT FOR YOU, SHE OBVIOUSELY HAS BEEN THERE AND DONE THAT, TAKE HER ADVICE GIRL. BLOOD IS LOVE AND SHE IS SPEAKING TO YOU FROM HER HEART. GOOOD LUCK MAMA, HOPE YOU ARE BLESSED WITH SOME WISDOM AND LOTS OF LOVE FOR ALL THAT YOUR GOING THROUGH. AT LEAST YOU KNOW YOU ARE NOT ALONE
 
LMAO @ Destiny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"HOT DAMN, AND A BAG OF DIDDLEY WOP"

LMAOOO 😀
 
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