Kenny Guido
Well-known member
You know you're from Long Island
if
you say you live on Long Island instead of in Long Island.
you've lived in Brooklyn all of your life.
your property taxes equal the cost of a new, midsized automobile.
you know how great a double-double burger from All American tastes after a full day at the beach.
you know that the Nathan's in Oceanside used to be called the Roadside Rest.
you know what OBI and CMI stand for.
you know that Glen Cove Road is in Mineola and Mineola Avenue is in Roslyn and Roslyn Road is in Westbury and Westbury Avenue is in Carle Place.
you pronounce it Com-mack and not Co-mack.
you know someone who has seen Billy Joel in Oyster Bay.
you recognize the places Nelson DeMille writes about in "The Gold Coast."
you went to Jahn's (ice cream parlor) on Hempstead Turnpike after a session at the "rolla" rink.
when directions to your house begin with, "Exit ... "
you remember Old Country Road when it was an old country road.
you know that Field Six is not a field but a place to park and enjoy beautiful Jones Beach.
you have to get a permit to have a yard sale.
election signs go up on your neighbors' lawns telling you to vote Republican. (What your neighbor doesn't tell you is that if he doesn't post the sign, he's probably out of a job.)
if you say Wantagh as Wantaw, not Wantog.
you love the Island for its proximity to Manhattan, but you rarely cross any bridges, so your E-ZPass has a permanent $25 balance.
when worse comes to worst, there's always a diner open.
someone asks you, "How far is ... ," and you answer in time rather than in distance.
you have the choice of dozens of beautiful beaches and you still own a swimming pool.
you go for a cuplov slices, you gotta get da bagels 'n' cream cheese, and you axed, "Did ja eet jet?"
every rational voice inside you that talks about rent, phone bills, taxes, electricity, mortgages, politicians, health care, traffic or sun tells you to leave ... and you still can't go.
you remember going to Jolly Rogers at the corner of Hempstead Turnpike and Hicksville Road.
you still look for the toll booth on the Southern State Parkway in Valley Stream.
you know your distant future might involve the state of Florida.
you refer to Westchester County as upstate.
you know where "The End" is.
you feel like you know Howard Stern.
when you're away from Long Island, you love it and when you're there, you don't.
you know the exact point at which Queens turns into Nassau simply on intuition.
you're still waiting for a bridge to Connecticut.
you've tried to use your father's monthly ticket to ride the LIRR. And it worked.
you know where the Commack Motor Inn is but you "have never been there."
you've never been to Times Square on New Year's Eve.
no, you don't want mustard on that burger!
the most exciting day of summer is when all tickets to every Jones Beach show go on sale.
you want the Yankees to stay in the Bronx, but would probably go to more games if they moved to Manhattan.
you can order a pizza pie and a soda and people will understand.
you've never taken an MTA bus.
you felt slighted when Snapple sold out.
you don't associate Fire Island with gay men.
when you hear Billy Joel's "Scenes From an Italian Restaurant" you try to figure out where it is. It's Christiano's in Syosset.
you know which parts of "The Godfather" were filmed on LI.
you always liked Billy Joel, but as soon as you leave, you love Billy Joel.
you don't see the big deal about the Hamptons.
you think if you're not from Long Island or NYC, you're not really from New York.
you don't go to Manhattan, you go to "The City."
you never realize you have an accent until you leave.
at some point in your life, you've gone clamming.
you curse. A lot.
if your parents didn't, your grandparents lived in the city.
you or someone you know has gotten an animal from North Shore Animal League.
you never want to "change at Jamaica."
your parents took you to Nathan's or Carvel (on the way home from the beach).
you can name at least three players on the Islanders' Stanley Cup teams.
you cope with the fact that the Islanders have completely tanked since LaFontaine left.
you remember the exact day you stopped going to Jones Beach and started going to Robert Moses.
you've had a seagull poop on your car.
even the concept of the Islanders ever leaving is unrealistic.
you've cruised on the "turnpike."
you know someone with a cabana.
you've played golf at Eisenhower Park (legally or otherwise).
you hate paying tolls.
you don't have to go far to see your family.
you know the difference between WLIR and WDRE, even though they played the same music.
you were an Islander/Met/Jet fan or a Ranger/Yankee/Giant fan. There was no crossover.
you can correctly pronounce Hauppauge, Commack, Islip, Islandia and Massapequa.
there are no real bagels or pizza anywhere else (except The City).
if
you say you live on Long Island instead of in Long Island.
you've lived in Brooklyn all of your life.
your property taxes equal the cost of a new, midsized automobile.
you know how great a double-double burger from All American tastes after a full day at the beach.
you know that the Nathan's in Oceanside used to be called the Roadside Rest.
you know what OBI and CMI stand for.
you know that Glen Cove Road is in Mineola and Mineola Avenue is in Roslyn and Roslyn Road is in Westbury and Westbury Avenue is in Carle Place.
you pronounce it Com-mack and not Co-mack.
you know someone who has seen Billy Joel in Oyster Bay.
you recognize the places Nelson DeMille writes about in "The Gold Coast."
you went to Jahn's (ice cream parlor) on Hempstead Turnpike after a session at the "rolla" rink.
when directions to your house begin with, "Exit ... "
you remember Old Country Road when it was an old country road.
you know that Field Six is not a field but a place to park and enjoy beautiful Jones Beach.
you have to get a permit to have a yard sale.
election signs go up on your neighbors' lawns telling you to vote Republican. (What your neighbor doesn't tell you is that if he doesn't post the sign, he's probably out of a job.)
if you say Wantagh as Wantaw, not Wantog.
you love the Island for its proximity to Manhattan, but you rarely cross any bridges, so your E-ZPass has a permanent $25 balance.
when worse comes to worst, there's always a diner open.
someone asks you, "How far is ... ," and you answer in time rather than in distance.
you have the choice of dozens of beautiful beaches and you still own a swimming pool.
you go for a cuplov slices, you gotta get da bagels 'n' cream cheese, and you axed, "Did ja eet jet?"
every rational voice inside you that talks about rent, phone bills, taxes, electricity, mortgages, politicians, health care, traffic or sun tells you to leave ... and you still can't go.
you remember going to Jolly Rogers at the corner of Hempstead Turnpike and Hicksville Road.
you still look for the toll booth on the Southern State Parkway in Valley Stream.
you know your distant future might involve the state of Florida.
you refer to Westchester County as upstate.
you know where "The End" is.
you feel like you know Howard Stern.
when you're away from Long Island, you love it and when you're there, you don't.
you know the exact point at which Queens turns into Nassau simply on intuition.
you're still waiting for a bridge to Connecticut.
you've tried to use your father's monthly ticket to ride the LIRR. And it worked.
you know where the Commack Motor Inn is but you "have never been there."
you've never been to Times Square on New Year's Eve.
no, you don't want mustard on that burger!
the most exciting day of summer is when all tickets to every Jones Beach show go on sale.
you want the Yankees to stay in the Bronx, but would probably go to more games if they moved to Manhattan.
you can order a pizza pie and a soda and people will understand.
you've never taken an MTA bus.
you felt slighted when Snapple sold out.
you don't associate Fire Island with gay men.
when you hear Billy Joel's "Scenes From an Italian Restaurant" you try to figure out where it is. It's Christiano's in Syosset.
you know which parts of "The Godfather" were filmed on LI.
you always liked Billy Joel, but as soon as you leave, you love Billy Joel.
you don't see the big deal about the Hamptons.
you think if you're not from Long Island or NYC, you're not really from New York.
you don't go to Manhattan, you go to "The City."
you never realize you have an accent until you leave.
at some point in your life, you've gone clamming.
you curse. A lot.
if your parents didn't, your grandparents lived in the city.
you or someone you know has gotten an animal from North Shore Animal League.
you never want to "change at Jamaica."
your parents took you to Nathan's or Carvel (on the way home from the beach).
you can name at least three players on the Islanders' Stanley Cup teams.
you cope with the fact that the Islanders have completely tanked since LaFontaine left.
you remember the exact day you stopped going to Jones Beach and started going to Robert Moses.
you've had a seagull poop on your car.
even the concept of the Islanders ever leaving is unrealistic.
you've cruised on the "turnpike."
you know someone with a cabana.
you've played golf at Eisenhower Park (legally or otherwise).
you hate paying tolls.
you don't have to go far to see your family.
you know the difference between WLIR and WDRE, even though they played the same music.
you were an Islander/Met/Jet fan or a Ranger/Yankee/Giant fan. There was no crossover.
you can correctly pronounce Hauppauge, Commack, Islip, Islandia and Massapequa.
there are no real bagels or pizza anywhere else (except The City).