the four letter word

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toni

toni

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ok i have been seeing this guy for 3 months...after about a month we slept together...sex was great!!! then the next day the four letter love word pops out of his mouth...now i know its too soon for this word, and i am thinking he is just souping me up, u know...he is 29 and i am 21, so i am thinking he is trying to just get the best of me...so a couple of weeks go by and he continues with this 4 letter word...and i do not return it...one night he calls me late...2 am, very out of his charater...and he is all like why dont u return the love word to me...i tell him my feelings on how i feel he is lying and that its to soon to make that call...so i say i really really care...he keeps on insisting i say this damn stupid word :crap...even goes so far to spell it out for me

now after that conversation things have gone very very very down hill...we dont speak like we use to, i have never heard the L word again, and the sex isnt that great anymore...i am thinking it has to do with me kind of rejecting his speaking of the L word...but i truely didnt believe we were in the right position to be saying that to eachother...its a special thing!!!!

how do i get things back to the way they were...i dont want to lose him for something so stupid, cause i do really like him...should i swollow my pide, pinch my self and just say that word...or should i just let it die...i mean what if i do say that word and he has already convinced himself that i have been playing games all this time...i dont know what to doooooooooooooooo?!?!?!?!? help!!!!!!!!
 
thats what i am sayin!!! and i didnt feel we fell into that catagory...but now things have gone so down hill

any ideas on how to fix the situation
 
i dont know!!! i really like him...he is sooooooooooooooo sexy!!! i know i am not its not true love, yet!!!
but i want to make things right between us again, u know *sigh*
 
Yeah but just because you don't feel you're in that catagory he feels it. Why do some people always put a time limit on certain things. There's no time limit with love, sex, etc. Some people just feel it sooner than others.
 
Look! If you don't feel it don't say it. You shouldn't be forced and/or pressured into it. If he can't handle it then he, as well as you, have the freedom to move on to someone else. If he wants to move somewhere too fast too soon then something is up. You need to go at a pace thats acceptable to both of you.
 
Toni, you may be making things hard for him.

I'm not saying you should say you love him. If you don't, then you don't, and you shouldn't say it if you don't mean it.

But just because he's saying it doesn't mean he's lying. My friends Mike and Cor met and started dating, and he fell in love with her right away. After only a few months, he got her an engagement ring and proposed. They've just celebrated their 5th anniversary and have two kids.

Falling in love is different things to different people. What you need to do is have a heart to heart talk with him. Let him tell you exactly how he feels, and then stress to him that for you, love takes time, and that love is not a word you throw around for no reason. Maybe once he realizes that, he won't pressure you so much.
 
Follow your heart toni,and if you truely don't feel it yet talk to the guy about it and let him know you need more time to sort out your emotions to make sure there genuine other wise you'll be lying to him and yourself....good luck
 
well i am just gonna leave this one alone...he is gettin very controling...so i dont really need to deal with that type of shIt
 
well good luck. wow i thought you were older then 21. you seem very mature for your age.
 
toni hey girl,

Definetly dont say it to him unless he means it. You said he is kind of controlling so my advice would be to sort of just let him be, and take the lesson that when that word is said it is most likely meant. One of the loves of my life told me he loved me after our first date, to this day he calls me his angel. So one never knows. Just follow your heart girl. Keep your eyes open, and stay strong, but listen to your heart and your intuition. Best of luck. Love/relationships are so damn rough *sigh*
 
my stupid ass went back to him after he kept calling 🙁

things have gotten better, however he is still controlling

oh well, but he is STILL HOT!!!!
 
plz nena don't ever put a man before u

yeah he may be hott - now
but he'll be a pain in your ass in a minute..

think about what U really want- you weren't ready to say LOVE....and if u feel things are right for the both of u- OK....

just remember a man who like to be in control will always try to control u.and I learn that the hard way, maybe this is why the way I am.
 
Toni,

1st of all look deep inside of you and make sure you really want 2 be around this person. 2nd of all if he means the L word then girl why is he acting different with you. Love can take everything and is patient. He is not showing you that he love's you by acting different so why worry about it. He shoud wait till your ready. So girl if UR not ready & he can't accept that well, its his loss!
 
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