mah first freestyle song =X

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ekin got rice

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i wrote this last niteeee .. tell me wha ju guys think 😀
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"I Cry" ... by ®2001 Ekin

[verse 1]
why do i cry, why did she have to lie
she told me she cared yet she left me to the side
a bullet through my heart, the pain is hard to bare
i ask myself why I should even care
a bleeding soul with no where else to go
those lonely nights yearning for her to hold

i cant believe im hurting so bad
a broken heart leaving me so sad
how could she be this way ...

[chorus]
the feelin of loneliness deep inside
the hurting in my heart i just cannot hide
knowing shes in the arms of another guy
in the darkness of night, i cry .. i cry .. i cry

[verse 2]
why cant i explain, why do i feel this pain
cuz everything i say she doesnt understand
she doesnt realize just how much I suffer
not appreciating anything that I do for her
words without meanin spoken from her lips
true love we couldve been but she let it slip

i cant believe im hurtin so bad
a broken heart leaving me so sad
how could she be this way ...

[chorus] 2x

[break]

[verse 3]
why cant i go on, why cant i be strong
to leave it all behind and not let it carry on
the moments we shared lingers in my mind
its hard to forget but i know in time
i'll find someone new and leave her behind
but until that day, i still wish that she was mine ....

[chorus] 2x
 
kool

i liked it i think ya got some talent although i have to hear how your voice sounds,unless you dont plan on singing it? but the words are definitely freestyle don't give up strive and you will rise peace 🙂 bnl
 
wow

this is unbelievable...i got the chills. im really a big fan of freestyle lyrics, i dont like songs without meaning. i hope you prosper with this, you definetly have the potential. if you ever want an opinion on how it sounds with music or whatever i'll be happy to give it to you. this is a great song
 
i really loved your lyrics Ekin. they had meaning and feeling. i'm working on some lyrics myself. maybe i can drop you some sometime. keep it up. muah!!
~*Linnette*~
 
hey Ekin that was great. i really liked it. i'm working on some lyrics myself, maybe i can drop y some sometime. keep it up!! muah =)
 
danks for da comments! i was bored on friday nite and listenin to freesytle got me inspired lol .. i wrote another one on sunday nite hehe ...

ILuvDaFreestyle, do i know u??? hehe 😀
 
Yo Ekin, do you have a melody for that song yet? If not, i'd like to give you a word of advice...always try to figure out the melody (simultaneously) as you write the lyrics. I always write my songs that way. I've found out that it makes it much easier to write the song this way, since it is very hard to try to fit in a melody to previously written lyrics, and vice versa. peace!
 
Props.................... Arturo

Arturo,


You hit the nail right on the head!!


So many aspiring songwriters seem to make that one crucial
mistake of not having a good melody for the songs they
write. And it has to be an original melody not someone
else's. (Arturo..very good advice)

Writing a song without a melody is like writing a poem.
You just cant call it a song if you dont have one.




Aside from that..Ekin...Keep doing your
thing ..dont ever say you cant.


Peace.......
 
Popstyle, i have found this method to give the best results, when writing songs...i'm glad to see that there are others out there who share my ideas...peace!
 
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