In need of advise, inspiration or just comments

[Dianita]

Lately there are a few things that I've been wondering about...Any response, be it positive or negative wold be very much appreciated....
OK, first- why is it that when you love someone, it's so hard to let them go even though you know they're not right for you?
Second- After making some bad choices in life, especially when it comes to relationships how can you trust the future decisions you make? For example you meet someone and you get to know them well or so you think and then later find out it was all a lie. How do you trust yourself after believing in someone after finding out it was never real?
And my third question is- Are men really like the lyrics in many freestyle songs make them out to be? Are they really romantic like that, or is it all just a bunch of lines to make money or to pick up women?

 

[DiaMoND_GiRL]

i know exactly what ur talkin about. when i broke up with my ex-man it was the hardest thing to let go of him, but thats because i needed closure. as soon as i got it... i felt a relieve. like a huge weight had me lifted off my shoulders. Maybe that could be it. :confused

About the trust thing... dont give n e one ur trust,until u believe they have earned it.

And about men... they're alot of good guys out in the world. Trust me.. i come to find this out now... :bangbang but they're are plenty of guys who are worth your time and energy. u just gotta look real hard for them. To me, most freestyle lyrics were written out of experience.... so im sure they are plenty of good guys out there. 😀

 

[ricanlips4u]

Lately there are a few things that I've been wondering about...Any response, be it positive or negative wold be very much appreciated....
OK, first- why is it that when you love someone, it's so hard to let them go even though you know they're not right for you?
Second- After making some bad choices in life, especially when it comes to relationships how can you trust the future decisions you make? For example you meet someone and you get to know them well or so you think and then later find out it was all a lie. How do you trust yourself after believing in someone after finding out it was never real?
And my third question is- Are men really like the lyrics in many freestyle songs make them out to be? Are they really romantic like that, or is it all just a bunch of lines to make money or to pick up women?

Wow.. Let me just say that.. Letting someone you love go is never easy. But being TRUE to yourself shouldnt be.. So.. when u have t o let someone go because its good for you.. you'll be strong enuff to go on..
Everybody makes bad choices.. Its how we learn.. And YES you can trust yourself again and again and again.. Thats what life is all about.. We live, make choices, make mistakes, get up and start anew..
I've made mistakes.. been lied to and cheated on but have found someone who has changed all of that and made me believe that there are good men still left who are looking to make someone happy.. 🙂
Oh yea.. he's romantic too! Big time! 🙂..
Good luck to you!! Keep your head up.. You will find someone deserving of your love..

 

[Dianita]

Thanks for the response guys. What makes my case hard though, is that my boyfriend doesn't want to let go either. Our problem is that he has some unresolved issues from his past which are really discouraging me. First of all I'll say he's younger but he's been so supportive. He helped me separate from my husband and now we've been living together for more than six months. Since I've met him I've always known that he has a son back in Ecuador. My boyfriend came here before his son was born when he wasn't even 18 yet. What he had told me at first was that a while after he was here, he had got word that his girlfriend, his baby's mother was with someone else. OK, I have no problems with him already having a baby, I have my own daughter, and I completely am OK with that. What happened is this- a while after we were together, he decided to tell me that he had married his son's mother, and that they were still married. They didn't have a ceremony or anything, it was just an official thing that his son's mother made him do so that they would agree to give the baby his last name. But, that's not even the big problem. What is is that he still appears to be in love with her.Even though he hasn't seen her in 5 years, it's obvious. He plans on going back next year to meet his son and there's a chance that he might reconcile with her, in which case me retiro and I let him go, but at the same time I truely believe that he's in love with me. He's never lived with his son's mother, and whenever we are about to break up he actually cries. I don't want to be responsible for breaking up a family, but I really believe that he is more in love with her memory than with her...I don't know ther's so much more to this...it's just all so complex...

 

[Unique_Freestyle]

Lately there are a few things that I've been wondering about...Any response, be it positive or negative wold be very much appreciated....
OK, first- why is it that when you love someone, it's so hard to let them go even though you know they're not right for you?
Second- After making some bad choices in life, especially when it comes to relationships how can you trust the future decisions you make? For example you meet someone and you get to know them well or so you think and then later find out it was all a lie. How do you trust yourself after believing in someone after finding out it was never real?
And my third question is- Are men really like the lyrics in many freestyle songs make them out to be? Are they really romantic like that, or is it all just a bunch of lines to make money or to pick up women?

Whats up Dianita, let me try to answer some of your questions for my perspective:

When you in love with someone, its hard to let them go, no matter how hard you try. The other person can hurt you, abuse you , make you cry and etc... In most cases love makes you do stupid things such as forgive, have optimistic thoughts, but if you really feel the other person is not the one for you...you must take the first hardest step which sometimes seems impossible but is possible, and thats to "let go".

You can trust your future decisions by living and learning, it took me several girlfriends in my life to know exactly what I wanted and what type of qualities I wanted in a women. In my humble opinion, you can never TRUST no one 100% except your family , but you take thier word, and if they mess up, then you put them on probation, if they strike out 3 times, send them away and throw away thier key to your heart.


From a songwriters perspective, yes as a man, my lyrics in the freestyle tracks I wrote were derived from inspiration from this female I use to dig, I wrote 2 songs for her, and if it wasn't for her , my song or my project would never come alive. But there are some songwriters out there that just write to write, but the songs I wrote were from passion, admiration, and being a romantic fella. And i only wrote songs for ladies that are ladylike, and not them hoodrats from the streets.

 

[Caleb-B]

Like Unique......I only write what i can relate to, storys of my past. Ans again like he said.......Let Go....Think Long term, not short term....and letting go will make sence. when we love a woman "Men" we do all the stuff in the movies and songs because we want to be with that person so bad...to us its worth it.....But if the love and attration aint there.....why waste our time .....Its that simple...You woman are the same in many ways but have differnt ways in action. If the writing is on the wall...READ IT.

 

[lilshygyrl]

im lost myself :crap

 

[Dianita]

Thanks Unique Freestyle and Galvatron for your replies. Just so y'all know I wasn't men bashing or trying to insinuate that men don't have those feelings. I guess I was having a really bad day and after hearing nothing but lies and empty promises, you feel kind of let down and it's hard to beleive in someone again. And what do you do if the writing's on the wall, but you just have no idea what it says.......?

And lilshygyrl, why are you lost?

 

[Enigma]

OK, first- why is it that when you love someone, it's so hard to let them go even though you know they're not right for you?

In most cases it can be low self esteem. You are not strong enough to face reality alone. For some reason you think in your heart that you can make that love one overcome and in the long run love you. But the truth is...if that person does not love you from the heart...there is no point for you to struggle and continue trying to work things out. If you are strong hearted...you will realize that breaking those chains...is the best thing one can do. The way I see it is...NEVER let your oponent have all the strength. The one who is in control...is you...and always you. You also have to think positive and realize that LIFE IS SHORT. God forbid tomorrow might be your last day.

Second- After making some bad choices in life, especially when it comes to relationships how can you trust the future decisions you make? For example you meet someone and you get to know them well or so you think and then later find out it was all a lie. How do you trust yourself after believing in someone after finding out it was never real?

The best way to really know that person is to become a best friend in the first place. Women are very smart creatures. The most intelligent on Earth. Women posesses the power of intuition. They know what is right and wrong from the get-go. So follow that. Alot of women when it comes to men...allow themselves to be manipulated in ways. Women need to be strong...and realize that this is a world in which they are in control...not man.

And my third question is- Are men really like the lyrics in many freestyle songs make them out to be? Are they really romantic like that, or is it all just a bunch of lines to make money or to pick up women?

There are romantic men out there...but from what i hear from women...it's quite rare. You also have to be careful...because some of those are the ones that have dirt in their closet. Men would pratically do anything for a piece of p*ssy. The best way to find a true man...is to be a true friend...don't rush anything...study that person well...and in your mind make a list of things that you are compatible with that person and can relate to. Also keep in mind that no relationship is entirely perfect. A strong relationship is build on trust, honesty, love and strong effort. When a man loves you he breaks his back for you providing for you and the family. When a man does not want to work...tells you lies...looks at other women with lust...well he don't love you.

Dayum i hope i made sense of some of this lol

-antonio

 

[Dianita]

Antonio, thank you for replying. You made some really good points...
The low self-esteem thing is why it took me so long to let go of my ex. I wasn't so bad before, kind of shy and yeah, I had my insecurities but I wasn't so down on myself. But for years, the ex told me how worthless I was and that if I ever left him, no one else would ever want me...I could go on about him, but yeah, basically all the signs were there that he didn't love me. Of course there's my daughter, I didn't want to separate her from her father, but she's actually happier now.
Now before my current bofriend was my boyfriend, he was just a friend, my best friend. And during the whole process of separating from my ex, he was there...He'd come and knock on the door and check if I was alright even though my ex was insanely jealous, even after my ex pulled a knife on him for doing so. My ex actualy destroyed his car and tried to run us off the road while he was giving me a ride home from work. We've always confided in each other about anything...
OK, so the one you got me on is to be positive, that life is short. It's my realization that life is short that keeps me from being so positive. So much crap has happened in my life, it makes me feel afraid. After losing someone that was so close to me who died without ever really having had the chance to live, I guess I almost feel destined to lose anyone that I love. I don't have trouble being optimistic for other people, but for myself, yeah. But if I really look, and I don't have to look to hard, in my current relationship, the good definately outways the bad....

 

[kxrider375]

One thing I've learned is that you have to communicate. Talk about EVERYTHING. Don't leave anything out. Once you start hiding $shiat is when things start going south and just because a guy has a good rap that doesn't mean you try everything you can to keep him. The moment you feel you're not on the same page, pull the plug on it. That's how you avid getting beat up inside.

It's all about no BULL$HIT. You're either with me or you're not........bottom line....

Be honest, straight and up front...and if he doesn't respond the same way or respect that, then he's OUT.

By the way there shoudln't be any bad. You should equally compromise because you love each other.