I Need Love...

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mizzfrankiej22

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I need love, I just got out of a nine year relationship and it ended in on bad terms. We had two kids together and he said if I was to leave he was not going to fight for the kids and I'm on my own. I just took the most improtant things for myself and the kids, I left most of it there. I just got a job and I'm working on getting a car. I have to start fresh now, but it seems so hard. A part of me is saying I was stupid for leaving, but I wanted a better life for my kids. I feel like its too much to handle and I'm scared to do it alone. I don't think I made a mistake, but I don't know.
 
Gurl, good luck. But you can do it. The most important thing in your life right now are you kids and yourself. Concentrate on bettering your life and your kids. After 9 years I "think" you might need a break from a relationship. Have fun and enjoy your kids!:sflower
 
ill tell you what mami, the first thing you need to do is change your name from misfrankie, it sounds like you dont want anybody to holla at you. the second thing you need to do is build up your self esteem, you probley had all types of guys trying to kick it to you when you were with this guy and now that your brokeing up with him you feel like nobody wants you, your wrong. men are attracted to women who are either very cute or very confident. either way, you need more confidence. i can tell by the thread you wrote. dont worry ma, im always gonna be honest about real shit like this. just dont be looking for love on the internet, take my advice, its more disappointing than a blind date.
 
Well what you say is true. I'm not looking for a relationship right now, my kids come first. I just need a shoulder to cry on. I'm devstated the way things went down. My kids are hurt that their daddy doesn't want anything to do with them. I am positive things are only going to get better from here, but right now its all too much to handle. Now that I have a job, having to worry about a babysitter is driving me crazy. I just need someone who will listen to me and not judge me. My family is here for me but they are quick to talk behind your back. I just want everything to be fine already.
 
Well we CFers will listen to you without judgement...at least most of us will be willing to. My advice to you is continue on your path without this man...its very sad that the kids are paying for the failure in the relationship...that isnt fair and if he was at least half of a man, hed make some attempt to spend time with his children on ocassion. But as long as those kids have you and you stay strong they will gain strength and hope from you. Good luck.
 
damm mama, this is the first time that i actually feel sad for someone that wrote a thread, i usually like to talk shit about peoples thread or atleast have some fun with what they write but with you i actually feel sad. i wish you all the luck in the world and i can tell that you deserve the best. whoever catches you is going to be so lucky. i wish i could find a girl like you that is family oriented and wants to better herself, i alwas get the girls that just want to use me. i feel like crying. waaaaaaaaghhhhhhhh. anyway, i bet you make it in life, i mean really make it , i can tell
 
Thank you for your advice Ghost. What doesn't kill me only makes me stronger. I want to be happy again and the only happiness I have is seeing my kids smile when they see me. And as for you Odilio thank you for saying such sweet things. I think I needed that. I cry everyday just to relieve the pain. Eventually everything will be good I just hope it comes soon. As for you finding all the wrong girls you're probably looking in all the wrong places. I hope you do find that girl of your dreams and I hope she makes you happy. Just keep your head up. Now I don't feel so alone, I'm glad I have cfers to give me a shoulder to cry on.
 
Anytime you need to let out your stress...poor it all on CF. Thats what this forum is for anyway. My heart goes out to u, and O iz right, the man who finds u is going to be lucky...just dont look too hard because he's already close by.
 
OdilioMunoz said:
damm mama, im gonna always be good to you and make you feel good but damm missfrankie, change your name because i feel like im talking to a dude, lol, naw, you know you got it going on, holla at ya boy when you get a chance, linemedic2005@yahoo.com ,[/......QUOTE]

Lol how is it that you feel like you're talking to a guy? mizzfrankiej...you know who Frankie J is right. hopefully my future husband...lol...j/k. I'll be sure to drop you a line. Thanks for understanding me.
 
Ghost said:
Anytime you need to let out your stress...poor it all on CF. Thats what this forum is for anyway. My heart goes out to u, and O iz right, the man who finds u is going to be lucky...just dont look too hard because he's already close by.
Thanks for all that you have said. My day is going a little better now. Yea when I find that man I will feel complete, but right now my kids are my focus. Making a better life for them is all I want to do. Thanks for understanding and hearing me out.
 
MizzFrankieJ.....Girl, I understand you, Ive been there.....my ex husband ended our relationship after 11 years; That is not all, I was 9 month pregnant with his baby girl. We have two kids...its now 6 years later, but I felt just like you, however I did not leave...he left, he had to start all over.....when we first had problems I left, but then I came back and told him, he had to leave......so he did. It was like the end of the world to me, I wanted to dieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee....he was my childhood sweetheart....from age 16 - 27. I was lonely, going nuts wondering how would I do it alone........I hated sleeping alone.....I cried night after night....he humiliated me by bringing another women in front of my home.....when it was time to pick up the kids....I was so hurt. I said to myself, I rather move on now, then wait later and then be left alone how my mother is now, dad stayed home, till we all married, then he left....she been loney like for 15 years, although now, she dating someone and she is so happy, and so am I........I dont knwo how old are your children, but we went to family couseling...cause they were so confused.....I was able to vent and the kids were understanding seperation and divorce, step families and all that crap......I learned to do things on my own, It was not easy but I got a new job for more pay...and of course, one thing I did not let him get over, is his child support, he made this kids too.....dont accept your on your own, take that sucker to court and get your what you are entitled, I dont know what was the reason for separation, but you get $$$, forget what he says. I had world war 3 with my ex....but he had to handle it.......its not gonna be easy, but I can tell you...I grown so much...Ived dated someone shorty after.........which was a rebound...it did not work...I was thinking of my ex...then I was alone for like 2 years, got to know me, who i am and what i wanted...., then I dated again.......i explored and was strong not to let a man hurt me again...till I found Mr Right.....he loves me like crazy and my kids too. Things are getting all better now and I happy...So girl cheer up, youre not alone...vent, talk about it. Cry if you have to.....Bring yourself up, look your best. He dont know what he has lost. It not gonna be easy, but youll be ok. Just think of what you need how you will be able to achieve it... Good Luck mama, and if you need to talk. babybettyb00p@aol.com
 
Girl your situation kinda sounds like mine. I was together with my kids father for 9 years to and I just finally gave up on the relationship just a few months ago. We have 3 beautiful kids together (if I could say so myself!). The only difference is that his kids are his world and at first i believed that he would turn his back on them if we weren't together. Girl he made all kind of threats just so we wouldn't break up, but those threats just ended up being empty ones. I was afraid of doing it on my own with three kids, and trust me it is hard but like you said what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. For me just when I think I'm finally getting somewhere then something comes up and it knocks me on my ass and I start feeling helpless. I sometimes think if I go back to him it will just be easier but then I think and I would rather be broke and struggling with my three kids and happy then to be stuck in a relationship with him and miserable about myself. Girl just keep your head up and pray for the patience and strength that you need to deal with what comes your way. The good Lord is what has kept me sane when I think I have hit rock bottom. As far as your kids father, maybe it is just the anger that has him trying to prove a point to you. Hopefully he'll realize that his life really ain't nothing without his beautiful kids in it. He'll miss them like crazy, if he doesn't already and it will drive him crazy.
If you want to talk my email is magpy1043@yahoo.com
Much love to ya Ma !!! :hearton
 
mizzfrankiej22 said:
I need love, I just got out of a nine year relationship and it ended in on bad terms. We had two kids together and he said if I was to leave he was not going to fight for the kids and I'm on my own. I just took the most improtant things for myself and the kids, I left most of it there. I just got a job and I'm working on getting a car. I have to start fresh now, but it seems so hard. A part of me is saying I was stupid for leaving, but I wanted a better life for my kids. I feel like its too much to handle and I'm scared to do it alone. I don't think I made a mistake, but I don't know.
Dams' girl i feel for you but at the end your kids are going to love you even more for pulling them forward. Children will always remember the little things. God never gives you more than you can handle. have faith and gain a realation ship with God. You are a beautiful and strong person already for being mature and doing the right thing. it's better for you to leave and unhealthy realation ship rather then to be a sour puss for the rest of your life. I knoe it's hard trust me i fell you too a lot of us baby mama's feel you too. find things to motivate you find things to distract you and tell your kids you love them... con todo tu corazon.. they will need to hear it. keep a good self esteem... anything that god creates is beautiful. And Girl trust me you are not stupid... don't ever be putting your self down (DON"T DO THAT)... your a beautiful mommy... Be strong in your self in the lord and for your children... they are your motivation to move forward.. you will be in my prayers MRs. Frankie j. Girl and i love frankie j too. god damn' he's fine and in the video wwwwhhhhhoooooohhhhhh i sssaiiid hhhhaaadddddaaammmmmm''''..... Hooolllllaaaa.... peace mrs.J... He he he. Cheer up girl he's an a hole.... he ain't no man... he wasn't man enough for you... you were to much woman for him anyway too. (you can do it)))...
 
I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who has written to me and thank you for your advice. He came by today looking for me and he did say he was going crazy not seeing his kids. He said he wants me to move back in with him so we can work on our seperation and how to deal with the kids. I told him i'm not going back. I don't want to be there unhappy. He said he know he lost something good and its nobody's fault but him. He told me if I wasn't going to come back he was going to shoot himself in the heart, cuz if he dosen't have his kids whats the point of leaving. I don't know what to do. Should I just wait it out and not call him? I'm so confused. In a way I feel so bad for keeping the kids but damn I'd rather them be with me then with him.
 
Adriana said:
Girl and i love frankie j too. god damn' he's fine and in the video wwwwhhhhhoooooohhhhhh i sssaiiid hhhhaaadddddaaammmmmm''''..... Hooolllllaaaa.... peace mrs.J... He he he. .
Girl I know, damn I just want to eat em up!! lol. He is hella fine. I take him anyday. One day maybe just one day he'll be mine! lol
 
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