Friends with Benefits

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Heavenly

Heavenly

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Well ok people the question for the day is ....

Is it ok to have a friend with Benefits...no attachments just two people who are friends having great sex??

I had one shortly I broke up with my ex of 8 years and well it worked because we were honest with each other from the begining, but then I decided it wasn't for me...

But is it ok? Even if you are honest with one another ....is it possible for a party to get hurt??? Could a relationship come out of this? Or is it doom from the begining?? Tell me your thoughts...

As for me...I'm trying to get over my ex, Bill (everyone knows about him) and well I kinda found a distraction....its not a rebound I don't think because I'm not letting my heart get in the way...I'm just having fun.
 
I KIND OF HAVE 1
A FRIEND THAT I MESS WITH WE STILL HAVE NOT HAD SEX YET

WE HAVE MAD FUN 2GETHER I HAVE KNOW HIM ABOUT 95 AND WE R MAD COOL I CAN TALK 2 HIM ABOUT ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING

I HAVE MAD LOVE 4 HIM AND WILL ALWAYS DO
BUT I C NOTHING WRONG
BUT I DON'T DO ANYTHING WITH HIM WHEN I'M HAVE A BOY FRIEND I DON'T FIND IT FAR 4 MY MAN IF I DO
 
Sure why not?,

If your ok with that and so is he then go for it. but if your a person that falls easily then maybe it's not a good idea.

I personally have never had it. not yet anyway😉
 
I've had one a few years ago. I was great friends with her. We hung out together a lot, went to movies and just had a great time over all. And we had great sex. Better than going around taking a chance on someone else. Things are different now. She has a boyfriend, but me and her are still good friends.

I think that as long as the understanding is there and the two people are mentaly mature to sustain that type of relationship without jeopardizing the friendship, I do not see any problem with it.
 
Yea sex with friends work as long as you have that understanding I have to agree with that. With Bill and I we started off as friends but we got close, sex didn't make us close, we did. From what I can gather everyone has been friends with the FWB for a long time....what if you just became friends like ummm lets say 3 months. Is it ok then or does it only work when you already based a solid Friendship?
 
Nor do I think there is anything wrong with it, just as long as both parties are honest and straight forward from the begining.
 
Heavenly, you can't hold yourself for a guy who you would like to be with for a long time?

I dont believe in that stuff. I guess I can put my hormones on hold for a very long time. 😛


~Antonio
 
Little late response

Hey Heavenly!! Sup?
Well... this response might be late, could be you already solved the issue... But I think there is nothing wrong with that type of relationship. I would hope that both are mature enough and honest enough with eachother when they get intimate that they can accept the feelings that come with this type of intimacy. If not, than one of the party might have issues later on. Best bet is honesty with yourself and your partner and communication. Thanks for allowing me to share my thoughts and advice...

John 😉
 
Hey John its NEVER too late to give advice and that is what so great about this Site....We have many different people who share the same passion...FREESTYLE, but we also have many different opinions. So its Kewl Enigma if you feel that sex shouldn't be taken sooo casually. I think A LOT of people don't sex seriously anymore, but then everyone is different. I think with me it feels good that someone finds me attrative and helps me with the void I feel inside. I would like to hear from some more peeps are what your thoughts are in on this subject.
 
Heavenly~ your last post summed up what I've been trying to write, just wasn't sure on how to put it, but what you said about how it feels when someone finds you attractive and about filling the void. I know from my personal experience, I thought a friend with benefits was what I needed after going through another break up. I was basically tired of all the games guys would play, so when things became physical with one of my friends, I figured I had the best of both worlds. Unfortunately I was wrong. I think when friends get involved on an intimate level like that, someone is going to eventually feel something for the other person and it won't always be reciprocated equally. In my case, I began to really fall for the guy (not saying love, but there was some intense feelings...well at least on my part.) To make this long story short, I got hurt when he stopped being honest and communicating with me, and then turns around one day and tells me he has a girlfriend. After a lot of tears, and eventually talking with him, we did manage to salvage the friendship, but now he thinks that everytime he wants to have sex or fool around or whatever and his gf isn't there that he can call me, and that is not how it works.

I know all situations won't end up like mine, because everyone is different. I know the reason I went for it was not just for the sake of having sex, because I don't take that lightly. It was like I stated earlier in the post...after a bad breakup and here was someone who wanted me. I didn't want to date the guy because I thought it might screw the friendship up if things didn't work, so when we talked about hooking up, I figured here's someone who cares about me and respects me and figured sex would strenghten our bond. In some ways yes it did. I just never thought I'd fall for him like I did.

After all this rambling, I guess my main advice is just to always communicate and also just be careful in making sure not to get hurt.


~Megan~
 
Originally posted by Heavenly
I think with me it feels good that someone finds me attrative and helps me with the void I feel inside. I would like to hear from some more peeps are what your thoughts are in on this subject.
Click to expand...

You dont need to have sex with a guy who is nothing more than a friend to feel attractive and help you with your void. 🙂

You can do the same by not having sex.

~Antonio
 
Dreamgirl....Nena, you just said what I was thinking. I started a relationship with my best friend Bill, and look where it got us. I thought us getting together couldn't separate us cuz we had a bond, but that it would make it stronger. I too didn't think I would fall head over heals over Bill....and now we're not even talking. I miss him like Hell but I lost all faith in him and any other man.

So here comes this Beautiful guy, who isn't asking anything from me and we're good friends....I don't think I will fall for him, but then am I putting myself in the same situation....

Enigma....You may be right, but you know sometimes when someone comes and says the right thing to you at the right time...I dunno. Right now I just want to stop crying want to stop missing Bill want this pain inside to go away ....I need the distraction and this guy happens to be the perfect one.
 
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