Dear Daddy;

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La Mas Grande

La Mas Grande

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Sitting here listening to the endless chattering of my children in the next room I wonder how is it you just chose to leave. As I hold my baby in my arms, I can’t help but wonder what kind of heartless man you were. To look in the eyes of you child and just put her down and never looked back. I try to understand because like everything else in you left this earth without giving me an explanation. I do not want to hate you anymore but I cannot seem to stop, I do not want to pity you because you do not deserve it. I listen to my children and my heart swells with pride, I listen to my children and this feeling of love just takes over. You left me here wondering what it is that is wrong with me, what was it about me that made you leave, what is it about you found you could not love. I never realize how much you have hurt me, I never realized how much I need your love, how much I needed a father. I am in such a state right now that I crave what I never had; I crave for affection from a man who never cared. I want to tell you so much that I love you daddy but you never gave me the chance. You never gave me what was rightfully mine; you just took it and ran away with a bottle. You chose a life that excluded me; you chose a life that eventually killed you. Tell me daddy, you can you imagine walking down the street and looking at a man asleep on the street. You could you imagine how my heart felt at the tender age of eight to realize that the man asleep on the street with his bottle of booze was the man who you called father.



Daddy you broke my heart a million times and not once did you try to make it right. I have cried for you like I have cried for no other. You were supposed to be my first love, the first real man in my life. Daddy why did you leave, tell what did I do wrong?



LMG
 
OMG MA I'M SOO CRYING RIGHT NOW. BUT YOU KNOW I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL. NOT THE SAME SITUATION BUT YOU KNOW. I LOVE YA MA. THEY NEVER KNEW WHAT THEY HAD. MAYBE THATS WHY I LOVE YA SO MUCH. WE KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE ABANDONED.

:sosad :sosad :sosad
 
:sosad

I'm so sorry you had/have to deal with this. You don't deserve it! Neither of you ladies do/did!

You have to know though...that it's NOT a fault of yours...it's THEIR fault! They missed out on 2 beautiful women. Women that despite being abandoned as you have...have turned out to be independent and able to take care of their own.
 
LMG, this is heartbreaking. Thank you for sharing this with us.

As for what was wrong with you, there is nothing wrong with you. What you need to be asking it what was wrong with him?
 
wow
to some point i know how you feel, i i grew up with out the love of a father
to not have the love of that one man that is supose to love you forever
thats hard
 
LAS MAS GRANDE- alot of us know this feeling, I came from an alcholic home,know only have one parent-my moms.I say,it's better to have one parent ,than none at all.By the way,I love your poem.
 
LMG.. mama, I feel your pain and I am crying for you... but I am also crying for myself. My father left when I was 5 and after remarrying and divorcing and remarrying again he now has other children he has left behind. The family he has now, the kids anyway.. don't know they have brothers and sisters and he has sent messages thru family in PR that he doesn't want me to look for him. I ask myself everyday how could a parent walk away from their kid(s) and not wonder.. what type of person did they turn out to be? He's never seen his grandchildren and never that I can remember said the words I've always wanted to hear, I LOVE YOU. My relationships with men have suffered because of the emptiness that I have.. the place in my heart that I have tried desperately for a man to fill. But the only man who can, doesn't want to. I am older now, and my life has become fuller, and yes the pain is still deep inside.. but I don't let it consume me anymore. I pray that there is justice and that God will comfort my heart..and I pray he will do the same for you.
A FATHER CAN BE ANYBODY, BUT A MOTHER IS JUST ONE!
GOD BLESS the mothers who hold it down and give the love of Two!
 
awww.

ya salio las lagrimas........

LMG- alot of us have had a similar experience...in my case my mom, I was 16, and pregnant.....
 
Thank You Guys, I Just Had To Let That Out. For Some Reason I Havent Been Able To Put It Out Of My Mind All Week. Once Again Thanks

🙂
 
damn,this here relates to me big time.but some things are just a li l different from you .it's good and definetly brought the tears in my eyes out. aww man gurl this is a dramatic realistic it is real. damn skippy real. beautiful. but it hurts just to read it. but writing is the best way to express it and let it out. it's reality.i feel ya on this one .mas
 
I guess we are all in the sam situation somehow. My Dad left when I was 6 and left my mom with 3 kids. He didnt bother to look for us until we were in our teens and even then it was like he was forced. I did not see him until I was 29 and to this day he still will not say the words I LOVE YOU. But it's ok because I have my mother's love and is more than enough. She did more than her best and for that she will always be my MOM and DAD.
 
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