a rap im working on

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how is it?

  • tight

    Votes: 3 37.5%
  • alright

    Votes: 2 25.0%
  • ok

    Votes: 1 12.5%
  • nope

    Votes: 1 12.5%
  • throw it away

    Votes: 1 12.5%

  • Total voters
    8

EMCUBED

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Location
shady h-town
freestyle...pain..

PAIN written by: EMCUBED
Have you ever felt pain / take a look in my eyes / what do you see / what comes to mind when you think of me / have you ever hated yourself / to a suicidal degree / put a gun to their head and steal their wealth / or was it to my head to endanger my health / ideas are so unclear / cant make up my mind / the truth is shaded and so hard to find / I wish my life was a tape I could just rewind / back to the day I was cursed / because these days are the worst / problems become to much to bare / trying to grasp goals that were never there / cant take it no more I just want to leave here / so far my life’s been a waste / nothing here worth a taste / looking forward I see nothing / black, darkness, loathing / waiting mentally holding / scolding / everyone for everything / hoping ill just wake up from a dream / but its reality / the mentality / of these places / these many faces / are all holding me back / all trying to throw me off track / and I’m about to crack / just breakdown / just like everything else meaningful in my life / just crumbled / everything I say its mumbled / have no self esteem / pull the trigger, my brain turns to cream / is it a way out / because for some reason I cant shout / I try and I fail / so why try at all / just lean up against the wall / wait for my life to pass me by / wait for the next one to lie / next time I’m in the sky / maybe ill come crashing down / I’m a human being / but for some reason me in the future I’m not seeing / if a gunshot sends gets them pleading / maybe a bomb will leave them bleeding / next time heeding / our quality of abstract existence / subsistence / so what do you have to say / do you wish to respond / or did this ruin the bond / between two people speaking / in tongues that are leaking / reaching / a point of speechlessness / writers block / tongue tide / rhymes so diabolical / you want to hide / in other words maniacal / or manipulative / take another look at how you live / a plague that’s bubonic / or how my lines become diachronic / I move supersonic / speeds you cannot follow / fly by and leave your insides hollow / next time I come back / you’ll notice my diacritical / in terms more medical / professional / do you understand me now / everyone is like how / my pain gives me the power / pain urges me to sour / new dialect for the hour / my flows are more lyrically articulate / like a poet and a critic / mixed they form a hypocrite / hysterogenic / the hysteria / like a vile filled with malaria / broke before your feet / why try to run / you got it your done / there’s no more time for fun / your wasted / your named soon to be pasted / as the one to be the terrorist / the anti-Christ / on route to the pentagon / the Whitehouse / how do they know this / in a billion people you just a lab mouse / my life is torn / between love and hate / why must I always wait / in some stupid !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!ing line / always end up behind / I’m never first / everyone will soon feel the pain / when I let go these words in a mad outburst / words can tare holes / throw blows / and stop shows / I don’t fret this shit / just kick back and go with the flow / why do I have this life / why do I love to let things ignite / speaking of fire / your extinguisher is about to expire / which means you cant put me out / stop what I’m about / I’m going to let loose / a cannon cant be stopped / like it, love it, its copped / chopped and slammed to the floor / everyone breaks way when I walk through the door / I got blood on my hands / is it yours / for sure its not mine / must have killed someone for real this time / slit their throat with a dull spoon / stomped on their spine / strange things happen when there’s a full moon / that’s it, it must be / trust me / bust three / run free / I wish / pain couldn’t be / wouldn’t be / shouldn’t be / but it is / staring me in the face / following me without a trace / doesn’t matter the pace / its right behind me / keeping me from winning this race / and all it does is drive me insane / diagnosed mental / and what do I say / this isn’t my body it’s a rental / eating pills in a straight jacket / and all because of the strain / my internal pain

:sbounce
 
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Damn I thought this was mad depressing but really good, I'm not much for gunshots and cannons, but, it was Hot. Keep writing.😉
 
yikes... it was damn deep bro! it was good... but damn i wish i didn't have to be so negative and shit ya know... but good work.. keep it up! f'real...

two.
 
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