Trust

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ROXYGURL

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HOW CAN YOU LEARN TO TRUST AGAIN? THE REASON WHY I ASK IS MY FRIEND CAUGHT HER MAN TALKING TO A FRIEND (SHE IS A GIRL) AND THEY BOTH CLAIMED THEY WERE JUST FRIENDS? OLD FRIENDS. I HAD THE SAME SITUATION MONTHS BACK AND EVERYTHING IS GOOD NOW. BUT SHE IS A WRECK! THEY BOTH SAID THEY WOULDNT TALK ANYMORE JUST BECAUSE HE LOVES HIS WOMAN. BUT SHE DOESNT BELIEVE HIM. SHE SAYS WHAT IF THEY TALK BEHIND MY BACK? I DONT KNOW WHAT TO TELL HER... HELP GUYS. SHE IS TAKING IT BAD... CHECKING PHONE CALLS ON THE CELLY AND WORRYING A WHOLE LOT. PLEASE GIVE ME SOME ADVISE TO TELL HER.... :confused
 
hmmm that is a tricky one cause she can be rght or she can be wrong. i say she should give it some time. see if her man is being truthful. if in 1 mnth he isnt then kick him to the curb.
 
From what I read I don't see anything wrong with what he did. It seems like your friend had no trust for her man in the first place. Just cause he was speaking to a woman she's freaking out. Sorry but "oh please". What's wrong with speaking with someone of the opposite sex. Unless there is any other evidence to accuse him on anything she should just have taken his word, and move on. And I'm sorry I'm not going to stop speaking to a friend just cause my woman can't deal with it. Becasue if it was switched she would bitch about the guy getting upset because she's speaking to a male friend. ANd they tell us deal with it.
 
good point latinocop. my guy talks to other women even on cf. he was friends with them b4 me. i am not jealous and i trust him 100%.
 
aim4night said:
good point latinocop. my guy talks to other women even on cf. he was friends with them b4 me. i am not jealous and i trust him 100%.
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Exactly. Plus like I always say, if they are the one worried about it or getting upset about it. They are the ones doing the cheating or did it in the past and are feeling the guilt.
 
Well I Dont What He Did Wrong Either, It Wasnt Like He Lied About Talkign To Her And Then Got Busted Doing So. I Have To Agree With Latino On This On.

🙂
 
Plus like I always say, if they are the one worried about it or getting upset about it. They are the ones doing the cheating or did it in the past and are feeling the guilt
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alot of time this is correct, other times its cause they were cheated on b4.
 
If she has trust for her man she should just let it go because insecurities such as not trusting someone can ruin the relationship, however if she has caught him in lies or even cheating then kick him to the curb because not trusing your mate is only going to drive both of them crazy. When there is no trust because of past issues then the trust is not going to come back. she has to let go of the situation because it is going to be on her mind all the time and negative energy takes control of your day to day functions. jealousy is a recipe for disaster, if you have trust he can talk to whomever he feels like it and vice versa.
 
LMAO @ this thread!

Since when is it a crime to have a friend of the opposite sex? :confused

Roxy? Your friend seems to have more issues then that with her man. I wish her luck cuz if she's gonna keep being paranoid...she's gonna push him away on her own.
 
ROXYGURL said:
HOW CAN YOU LEARN TO TRUST AGAIN? THE REASON WHY I ASK IS MY FRIEND CAUGHT HER MAN TALKING TO A FRIEND
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WELL i think if she CAUGHT her man.. he mustve been hiding it... girl been there done that... LOL...This is very hard cause unfortunetly he wasnt being honest saying in the first place they were friends, he said it once he got caught talking to her.... i see nothing wrong with having guy/girl friends.. but when your hiding it, then somethings up....
I think she should just chill out & see what happens if he says they stopped talking, & she finds out that hes lying then she should take it from there.... 🙁 & tell her GOOD LUCK !!!!
 
aim4night said:
alot of time this is correct, other times its cause they were cheated on b4.
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True, but she shouldn't treat new men in her life like they were the old ones in the past. Treat all new men equally with trust.
 
Trust is something that is earned you just don't give trust to people you just meet, you are right she should not judge based on past experiences but trusting someone u just meet or do not know well is not to wise. Believe half of what you see and none of what you hear.
 
Well, for me trust is given not earned. But lost because of actions that is being done. Because people could feel that trust is not given. And why should you try to start or be in a relationship if there is no trust in the begining. There has to be some type f trsut. If you think each man/woman you're with they are bound to cheat on you then YOU have issues. Then it is you and not the person you're with.

The "YOU" is in general not pointing fingers.

 
How do you trust someone you meet lets say in a cofee shop? do you know them? do you know their intentions? it is something that can be abused if it is just given without it being earned. that what happens, you give trust to someone and they betray you and then you say why did they do this, and in reality it was not them, it was you who gave them your trust without them earning it. get to know the person first if they show and prove to you that they can be trusted then as time goes by you give them more and more trust. you don't have to get into relationships thinking that the woman or man is going to cheat because then that makes you the person with the issues remember someone is trying to gain your trust in this situation. i don't know how much you value your trust but mine has to be earned. The you is in general too.
 
Well, of course your defensives are up etc. But I'm not going to treat that person because of what others did to me in the past. That was them not the new person. Hence I give 100% trust. Maybe I gave the wrong example. But I hope this clarify everything. 😀

But like how the thread started she doesn't trust her man anymore. For what because he was speaking to another woman. Come on now. If she is feeling that way because of other men that was in her life, cheated on her, she should get a grip. This gut did nothing wrong.
 
You should definitely not take past relatonships or experiences that were negative and treat the new person bad based on what you went thru, i just know from experience and other peoples experiences that trust has to be earned, no matter what if you give it without knowing the person you are the one that has to deal with the hurt when you ask yourself why did they do this to me. so that means if you meet me, you will trust me? i don't think it works that way but you know what is good for you, i guess. you are right why doesnt she trust what he said is the question, is it because the trust was broken or just her thinking that he might be up to no good.
 
Thanks For All The Feedback Guys, Much Appreciated. Well Yes She Caught Her Man, He Did Not Tell Her. Granite They Both Say They Were Friends, But When She Awnser His Celly, She Would Hang Up On My Friend, Like They Did Have Something To Hide. But Now They Both Told My Friend That They Wouldnt Talk Anymore. But Now She Is Scared They Told Her That Just To Make Her No Trip Anymore. Her Man Told The Friend Straight Up They Couldnt Talk Anymore Cause They Were Fighting And It Wasnt Right. They Both Agreeded To It. But She Questions Him Consitntly, Who You Talking To, And Checking His Phone.
 
Just Friends.. And They Both Told Her That. But I Think She Is Trippin Cause It Was All Done Behind Her Back.
 
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