Something to B*tch about

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foreverlove

foreverlove

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Same Sh*T Different Day
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Well I thought I would vent my frustration here so what ever you wish to add or advice you would like to tell please feel free.

I have been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years. We have been through a hell of alot but.................. I am very frustrated.

I work not him. When we talk about it, it turns into an argument. Basically I am fed up. I am tired of going to bed late (he has company) and getting up early (he can sleep all day) and going to work. Financially I am falling behind. I do not have family to depend on. Sometimes I feel like I am going to fall apart. I don;t know what to do anymore. I do love him, but this has got to end. He has to help financially.

He says he doesn't because it was my apt first then he moved in with me. I know it is a crock of shit but hey I didn't say it.

I know what I should do but like they say - "breaking up is hard to do."
 
Look Ma Talking From Years Of Experience On That Shyt Get Rid Of The Loser. He's Going Along For The Ride And Will Drop U In A Second If The Opportunity Arose. Don't Ever And I Mean Ever Let Any Nicca Try And Take Advantage Of U. Since He Says Its Ur Apt And U Should Be Responsible Then He Should Abide By Ur Rules. Put Ur Foot Down And Stand Up For Urself. If Not U'll End Up Hurt Regardless Of The Outcome. Trust Me On This One
 
I know. So how o you think I should handle breaking up? I am having major problems with this. We have broken up in the past and he always comes back.
 
He comes back because you let him.

If he has keys to the place, change the locks. Don't let him back.

If you do, he will only keep coming back and taking advantage of you.
 
See that is the problem. He does have keys - which I have taken already. The police once told me I have to leave. Which I feel is bullsh*t because that is my apartment. I have tried which is why I am still in this position. A LESSON WELL LEARNED.
 
Exactly what Chuck said. Chnage everything and fuk him. If you want, go to the police dept. and fill out a domestic incident report saying he abuses you verbally. That way you have something on paper and if he comes again you may be able to get a restraining order. But you didn't hear that from me, becaue it is illegal to say something that did not occured. Don't want to put a dark cloud in the situation but just to keep this in mind.

But.........there's always a but. Just a little something to know about the law. Here in NYS and it's usually the same everywhere. If someone resides in a dwelling for more than 30 days he/she has every right to be there. Even though the mortgage/lease does not have thier name on it. By changing the locks is a good thing, but if the person just breaks a window or kicks in the door or gets someone to pick the lock he can and there is nothing the law can do to that person. He/she has every right to be there. You would have to leaglly have that person evicted. That takes a very long time.
 
foreverlove said:
See that is the problem. He does have keys - which I have taken already. The police once told me I have to leave. Which I feel is bullsh*t because that is my apartment. I have tried which is why I am still in this position. A LESSON WELL LEARNED.
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LOOK MA.....DO WHAT CHUCK SAYS. CHANGE THE LOCKS IS HIS NAME ON THE LEASE? IN WHOSE NAME ARE THE RECORD OF PAYMENTS? GIRL PUT UR FOOT DOWN AND IF UR WILLING TO HAVE IT WORK GIVE HIM AN ULTIMATUM. TELL HIM HE HAS X AMOUNT OF DAYS TO GET HIS SHYT STR8 OR UR DONE. LEMME ASK U SOMETHING.........HOW DOES HE PAY FOR HIS STUFF?
 
That is not a MAN. Where do guys like this get the balls to pull some $hit like that? Que huevos tiene este pendejo!

WOW! Amazing.

You know if he won't leave, start treating him like the little biatch he is. Make him start cleaning the house and cooking and doing all the damn house work. I bet that boy will be out in a few days. And if he doesn't do it start abusing him verbally to get the work done. That's exactly what a man would do if he busted his a$$ all day and had a lazy wife at home who didn't do $hit. Start riding his a$$ to get all this crap done....especially when his friends are around......$hiat, he'll be out in a heartbeat.......Mr. Mom is the last thing these type of guys want to look like...esecially around their friends.
 
DJ_JTEK76 said:
do you guys have kids//?????? if so it's a diffferent scenerio
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What do you mean with kids makes a difference? I would never stay with a woman I was not in love anymore, if I had kids. People always say I stay for the kids. Which is the stupidest thing I ever heard. Do people think the kids are better off? Do people think the kids do not sense you do not love eachother anymore? Staying together will put a burden on the kids they know alot more than you think.
 
latinocop said:
What do you mean with kids makes a difference? I would never stay with a woman I was not in love anymore, if I had kids. People always say I stay for the kids. Which is the stupidest thing I ever heard. Do people think the kids are better off? Do people think the kids do not sense you do not love eachother anymore? Staying together will put a burden on the kids they know alot more than you think.
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WHAT IM SAYING IS THAT....SHE' CANNOT JUST PICK UP AND LEAVE IF SHE HAVE KIDS....SHE HAVE TO SIT DOWN AND LET HIM KNOW THE DEAL..OR THE PROBLEMS THEY HAVING......SHE'S HAS TO LET HIM HOW SHE FEELS ABOUT THEIR RELATIONSHIP.....THAT'S ALL...
 
He's the one that should leave not her. Even if she had kids or not. It was her place not his. Also, by having kids she will get the place not him. The law is set up that way. Unless she chooses to leave.
 
I don't necessarily agree LCop. Having kids HAS to make you more tolerable of each other.
I can't stand when people just absolutely don't take in to consideration the affect of the kids in these types of situations. Granted if it's a really bad relationship and it's affecting the kids negetively then yes you do need to leave, but my god everyone is quick to up and leave and just find someone else to have more kids with, just because they couldn't work things out to their liking......WHEN ARE F___ING PEOPLE GOING TO STAND UP AND START TAKING REPOSIBILITY FOR THEIR ACTIONS AND COMMITMENTS.....

Now LCop I don't mean to be testy on this issue because being a peace officer I'm sure you've seen your share of domestic abuse and domestic nightmares, but people have got to start taking responsibility.......PLEASE.........
 
kxrider375 said:
I don't necessarily agree LCop. Having kids HAS to make you more tolerable of each other.
I can't stand when people just absolutely don't take in to consideration the affect of the kids in these types of situations. Granted if it's a really bad relationship and it's affecting the kids negetively then yes you do need to leave, but my god everyone is quick to up and leave and just find someone else to have more kids with, just because they couldn't work things out to their liking......WHEN ARE F___ING PEOPLE GOING TO STAND UP AND START TAKING REPOSIBILITY FOR THEIR ACTIONS AND COMMITMENTS.....

Now LCop I don't mean to be testy on this issue because being a peace officer I'm sure you've seen your share of domestic abuse and domestic nightmares, but people have got to start taking responsibility.......PLEASE.........
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THANK YOU....JUST WHAT I WANTED TO SAY...YOU TOOK THE WORDS OUT MY MOUTH KXRIDER.........
 
That kind of hit a nerve.

I have a really good friend of mine who might endup in this type of situation. They just had a kid and her man initially wanted her to abort the kid, just because he was in the middle of law school and he felt he had his whole life ahead of him, but yet they lived together and he wasn't complaining when he was playing husband and wife with this girl. So when the time came to step up and be a man and take responsibility.....he wanted to bail out......but yet she was their for him the whole time and she's supporting him and putting him through law school........Now he just finished law school and the girl is waiting for him to decide to get married and make it official and I doubt this guy is going to do it. It looks like he is going to start rolling that attorney pay and just start making child support payments and move on. So where does she end up????? Just because this punk doesn't have big enough balls and is selfish. "Pero que bonito tenia la situacion" playing husband and wife when it's convenient. When is this $hit going to stop.

Not only that She is FINE and this guy looks like a dog, but I guess that part is her fault.
 
There is no one that takes care of their men better than Latin Women. When are we as Latin men going to stop making them single mothers, just because we want to run around or because we think we see the grass greener else where?

"Tienen mas huevos las viejas que se qedan solas a crear los ninos, que los pinches so called hombres que las dejan"

Let me get off my soap box now.....
 
kxrider375 said:
I don't necessarily agree LCop. Having kids HAS to make you more tolerable of each other.
I can't stand when people just absolutely don't take in to consideration the affect of the kids in these types of situations. Granted if it's a really bad relationship and it's affecting the kids negetively then yes you do need to leave, but my god everyone is quick to up and leave and just find someone else to have more kids with, just because they couldn't work things out to their liking......WHEN ARE F___ING PEOPLE GOING TO STAND UP AND START TAKING REPOSIBILITY FOR THEIR ACTIONS AND COMMITMENTS.....

Now LCop I don't mean to be testy on this issue because being a peace officer I'm sure you've seen your share of domestic abuse and domestic nightmares, but people have got to start taking responsibility.......PLEASE.........
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I AGREE COMPLETELY W/ WUT U SAY KX ABOUT PPL TAKING RESPONSIBILITY, BUT ITS A 2 PARTY ROLE THAT SHOULD BE PLAYED AND APPARENTLY ITS ONLY ONE SIDED HERE. LOOK I BEEN WHERE SHE'S BEEN AND I HAVE 2 KIDS. LET ME TELL U THAT I AM GRATEFUL THINGS HAPPENED THE WAY THEY DID B/C OBVIOUSLY HE DIDN'T LOVE ME AND WELL THE KIDS KNEW. IT AFFECTS THEM SO MUCH MORE THAN WE THINK SO I'M SORRY BUT I DO HAVE TO DISAGREE W/ U ON THAT POINT. PPL SHOULD NOT STAY TOGETHER JUST FOR THE KIDS SAKE. YES IT WILL BE TOUGH BUT SO LONG AS BOTH PARENTS ACT AS SUCH AND BE PARENTS THEN ALL SHOULD BE STR8. EVERYONE IS ENTITLED TO THEIR OPINIONS AND I'M STATING MINE SPEAKING FROM PERSONAL EXPERIENCE. IN A PERFECT WORLD CHILDREN WOULD HAVE BOTH MOM AND DAD AT HOME AND BE A HAPPY FAMILY. BUT WHAT GOOD DOES IT DO WHEN MOM IS BUSTING HER ASS WORKING COOKING CLEANING TAKING CARE OF EVERY LITTLE SINGLE DETAIL AT HOME WHILE DAD IS JUST LOUNGING AROUND DOING SHYT NOTHING? BELIEVE ME MY KIDS KNEW AND THEY WOULD ALWAYS QUESTION WHY I HAD TO DO SO MUCH AND PAPI DIDN'T? NOW IS THAT A HEALTHY ENVIRONMENT TO RAISE THE KIDS IF WE'RE BOTH IN IT FOR THEIR SAKE? I THINK NOT, SO ITS BETTER NOT TO STAY JUST FOR THEIR SAKE IF U KNOW IT AIN'T GONNA WORK. MAKES SENSE?
 
I think somewhere along the lines most of us have been in a similar situation. Bottom line is this. You have to ask yourself, do you love him and do you love him THAT much you are willing to put up with his peg bundy lifestyle? I say give his ass an apron, a mop and a bucket or give him da boot!

The fact he says it was your apt when he moved it doesn't mean $hit and doesn't mean he will change. People with that mentality are usually past the stage of change.

'nuff said.

Just my 2c.
 
That's what I'm talking about. People have to be more tolerant of each other and still have respect for one another. The facts with this guys is that he doesn't care about either and that's what makes the whole situation one sided. He must care more for his girl and the kids (if they have any) than himself.

I may not have been clear enough. What I was trying to get across is that both adults need to see beyond themselves. They need to value their family unit, their kids, their partner more than themselves. THey need to see the value of needing to be there as a couple for their children. This is what motivates a man to go out and provide for his loved ones. If this guy cared for his girl and kid(s). He would feel ashamed when he's sitting on his ass all day.

I spent close to a year unable to find a job (18 years exp. in my field) and I can't tell you badly I felt like a failure. It was so depressing. I was so ashamed about where I was in life. I ended up taking a 50% paycut just to start making some money and providing again.

Granted this guy doesn't care and who knows if he can be convinced that his family needs him to be a better man and father, but there are so many guys like this now and that's what makes me sick. I guess my beef is with these so called hombresitos that act all macho and like such players but can't take responsibility for what they created.

I know this guy from the neighborhood that has 4 kids from 3 different women and doesn't support either one of them. What the F___ is that? Tell me that a$$hole like that don't need to have their tubes tied.

Why do you think there are so many beautiful single moms out there now.
 
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