Kenny Guido
Well-known member
** Does a clean house indicate that there is a broken computer in it?
**Why is it that no matter what color of bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
** Is there ever a day when mattresses are NOT on sale?
** Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with the hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
** Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give their vacuum one more chance?
** Why is it that no plastic garbage bag will open from the end you first try?
** How do those dead bugs get into closed light fixtures?
** Why do we wash BATH towels? Aren't we clean when we use them? If not then what was the purpose of the bath?
** Considering all the lint you get in your dryer, if you kept drying your clothes would they eventually just disappear?
** When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say 'Its all right'? It isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That hurt, you stupid idiot'?
** Is it true that the only difference between a yard sale and a trash pickup is how close to the road the stuff is placed?
** In winter, why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
** If diamonds are a girl's best friend and a dog is man's >best friend, who really is the dumber sex?
** Why are the needy only thought of during the holidays? Aren't they just as needy throughout the rest of the year?
** How come we never hear any father-in-law jokes?
** Do Chinese people get hungry an hour after they eat American food?
** Is the real reason women live longer than men because they don't have to live with women?
**Why is it that no matter what color of bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
** Is there ever a day when mattresses are NOT on sale?
** Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with the hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
** Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give their vacuum one more chance?
** Why is it that no plastic garbage bag will open from the end you first try?
** How do those dead bugs get into closed light fixtures?
** Why do we wash BATH towels? Aren't we clean when we use them? If not then what was the purpose of the bath?
** Considering all the lint you get in your dryer, if you kept drying your clothes would they eventually just disappear?
** When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say 'Its all right'? It isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That hurt, you stupid idiot'?
** Is it true that the only difference between a yard sale and a trash pickup is how close to the road the stuff is placed?
** In winter, why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
** If diamonds are a girl's best friend and a dog is man's >best friend, who really is the dumber sex?
** Why are the needy only thought of during the holidays? Aren't they just as needy throughout the rest of the year?
** How come we never hear any father-in-law jokes?
** Do Chinese people get hungry an hour after they eat American food?
** Is the real reason women live longer than men because they don't have to live with women?
