Lookee what happened to my personal e-mail box...

Harv Roman

Radio Personality : WCEV 1450 AM Chicago
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This was e-mailed to me after this morning's show...

The views are not necessarily those of my own, but I chuckled a bit.

Harv Roman

MEN AND WOMEN COMPARED:

NICKNAMES:
If Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose go out for lunch, they will call each
other Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose. If Mike, Charlie, Bob and John go
out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla,
Peanut-Head and Scrappy.

EATING OUT:
When the bill arrives, Mike, Charlie, Bob and John will each throw in $20,
even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller,
and none will actually admit they want change back. When the girls get
their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY:
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he wants.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item on sale that she doesn't want.

BATHROOMS:
A man has six items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, comb, shaving cream,
razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Holiday Inn. The average number
of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to
identify most of these items.

ARGUMENTS:
A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that
is the beginning of a new argument.

CATS:
Women love cats. Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking men
kick cats.

FUTURE:
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

SUCCESS:
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

MARRIAGE:
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she does.

DRESSING UP:
A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage
answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail. A man will dress up for
weddings and funerals.

NATURAL:
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING:
Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about
Dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fear
fears and hopes and dreams. A man is vaguely aware of some short people
living in the house.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:
Any married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people
remembering the same thing.



Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter,
and those who matter don't mind!
Dr. Suess
 
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