Li'l Billy Jokes

1sxychica

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LITTLE BILLY ON ..... PHILOSOPHY

A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and
you shoot one of them, how many will be left?" She calls on little
BILLY. He replies, "None, they will all fly away with the first gun
shot."
The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4, but I like your
thinking."

Then little BILLY says, "I have a question for YOU.
There are 3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream: One is
delicately
licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream. The second is
gobbling down the top and sucking the cone. The third is biting off the
top of the ice cream.
Which one is married? " The teacher, blushing a great deal, replied, "
Well, I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the
cone.

To which Little BILLY replied, " The correct answer is 'the one with
the
wedding ring on', but I like your thinking."


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LITTLE BILLY ON ..... MATH:

Little BILLY returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic.
"Why?” asks the father.
The teacher asked 'How much is 2x3', I said "6," replies BILLY. "But
that's right!" says his dad.
"Yeah, but then she asked me 'How much is 3x2?'"
"What's the f---ing difference? " asks the father. That's what I said!"
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LITTLE BILLY ON ..... ENGLISH:

Little BILLY goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going
to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word? " BILLY says " Mas-tur-bate."
Miss Rogers smiles and says, " Wow, little BILLY, that's a mouthful."
Little BILLY says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."

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LITTLE BILLY ON ..... GRAMMAR:

Little BILLY was sitting in class one day. All of a sudden, he needed
to
go to the bathroom. He yelled out, " Miss Jones, I need to take a
piss!!"
The teacher replied, " Now, BILLY, that is NOT the proper word to use
in
this situation. The correct word you want to use is 'urinate'.
Please use the word 'urinate' in a sentence correctly, and I will allow
you to go.
Little BILLY, thinks for a bit, and then says, " You're an eight, but
if you had bigger tits, you'd be a TEN!"

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LITTLE BILLY ON ..... GRAMMAR:

One day, during lessons on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show of hands from those who could use the word "beautiful" in the same
sentence twice.
First, she called on little Suzie, who responded with, "My father
bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it.
"Very good, Suzie," replied the teacher.
She then called on little Michael.” My mommy planned a beautiful
banquet and it turned out beautifully.
She said. "Excellent, Michael!"
Then, the teacher reluctantly called on little BILLY.
"Last night, at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was pregnant, and he said "Beautiful, just f---ing beautiful!"

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LITTLE BILLY ON ..... GETTING OLDER

Little BILLY was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar
after another.
After the 6th one a man on the bench across from him said, "Son, you
know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you acne,
rot your teeth, and make you fat.
" Little BILLY replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old."
The man asked, "Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?"
Little BILLY answered, "No, he minded his own f---ing business."

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Excuse some of the content, I copy-pasted from my email account :)
 
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