Input please...

AlyM

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OK - Riddle me this - I was out with friends this weekend and I noticed that there is an influx of single women that hang on married men (we will call these women "Hangers-On"). What is that about? The men in question were more than obvious that they were married, that they were just out with friends and made NO overtures to the "hangers on" in question, yet the hangers on still did not let that deter them. The men, of course, were oblivious to the attention. Here's another point - even when the wives were IN attendance, said hangers on were beyond disrespectful... :confused:

I'm just wondering, when did courtesy become extinct in this arena or is this a new phenomena? Is it the thrill of the chase? Are married men the new "thing"? I know I, for one, just sat back in amazement wondering what the hell was wrong with these women. Just my opinion - opinions/thoughts?

Did Sex & The City ever do an episode on this... :mad:
 

MS KENNY GUIDO

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AlyM said:
OK - Riddle me this - I was out with friends this weekend and I noticed that there is an influx of single women that hang on married men (we will call these women "Hangers-On"). What is that about? The men in question were more than obvious that they were married, that they were just out with friends and made NO overtures to the "hangers on" in question, yet the hangers on still did not let that deter them. The men, of course, were oblivious to the attention. Here's another point - even when the wives were IN attendance, said hangers on were beyond disrespectful... :confused:
I'm just wondering, when did courtesy become extinct in this arena or is this a new phenomena? Is it the thrill of the chase? Are married men the new "thing"? I know I, for one, just sat back in amazement wondering what the hell was wrong with these women. Just my opinion - opinions/thoughts?
Did Sex & The City ever do an episode on this... :mad:

If the wives know the 'hangers' and it's ok with them then all is good, if not, then it's a No-No.
I was wondering this myself, good timing.
 

toni

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MAYBE they weren't chasing anyone. MAYBE they were just hanging out and didn't mean to disrespect anyone and it never crossed their mind the wife might be upset.
 
C

Chickie

It seems as though there is an issue of "Etiquette" to be discussed here. Perhaps these women have a lack thereof. A true lady behaves with class and maturity, to respect not only herself but those around her. A lady does not attempt to covet a married man. When one does attempt to covet another who is married this is a disgrace; not only to the spouse but to the individual that is making the attempt. Where is the honor of attempting to covet one who has made a life long commitment to their spouse - and especially if they are already content? What does this achieve? Perhaps some frustration and the display of dysfunctional behavior that is not only inappropriate but disgraceful! Perhaps some of these people do not hold self respect or self honor and they feel that because they live a life of misery and dysfunction that everyone else is just as bad off as them? NOT! People who are married - hold eachother in very high regard and have commited themselves to a lifetime of happiness and devotion and work very hard at a relationship to maintain this. Why would someone try to get between that and try to be so destructive? The answer is Dysfunction. Times have really changed and though I may not be a Christian - I believe in the faith and kindness of man-kind. Our forefathers who settled this country came from Europe. They held their beliefs strong and their honor was strong! They were fine people who worked hard at creating harmony and maintaining peace amongst the people. With that they brought in religion and it has helped us to maintain peace and avoid problems throughout the centuries. The rules they have stood by live within the 10 commandments.

10_Comm.gif


Now the old saying "God Don't Like Ugly" really holds true and Karma is a Powerful energy! What comes around does go around!

There has been a lot said here and with this, I really wish there were more therapists to help these truly dysfunctional people cause they really do need psychological help.

I'd like to recommend the following program to anyone who may need it or perhaps for others to spread the word about a not-for-profit (free) 12-step program for dysfunctional individuals who are in need of help of acquiring a functional relationship. It's called Co-Dependents Anonymous.

http://www.codependents.org/

http://www.codependents.org/

Patterns and Characteristics
of Codependence
These patterns and characteristics are offered as a tool to aid in self-evaluation. They may be particularly helpful to newcomers.
Denial Patterns:

* I have difficulty identifying what I am feeling.
* I minimize, alter or deny how I truly feel.
* I perceive myself as completely unselfish and dedicated to the well being of others.


Low Self Esteem Patterns:

* I have difficulty making decisions.
* I judge everything I think, say or do harshly, as never "good enough."
* I am embarrassed to receive recognition and praise or gifts.
* I do not ask others to meet my needs or desires.
* I value others' approval of my thinking, feelings and behavior over my own.
* I do not perceive myself as a lovable or worthwhile person.


Compliance Patterns:

* I compromise my own values and integrity to avoid rejection or others' anger.
* I am very sensitive to how others are feeling and feel the same.
* I am extremely loyal, remaining in harmful situations too long.
* I value others' opinions and feelings more than my own and am afraid to express differing opinions and feelings of my own.
* I put aside my own interests and hobbies in order to do what others want.
* I accept sex when I want love.


Control Patterns:

* I believe most other people are incapable of taking care of themselves.
* I attempt to convince others of what they "should" think and how they "truly" feel.
* I become resentful when others will not let me help them.
* I freely offer others advice and directions without being asked.
* I lavish gifts and favors on those I care about.
* I use sex to gain approval and acceptance.
* I have to be "needed" in order to have a relationship with others.
 
C

Chickie

Are spankings allowed on this message board? *pass the paddle please*
 
C

Chickie

MS KENNY GUIDO said:
That is on a different thread. lol

Well then again, if we can gather all these lonely women who do the wrong thing at the wrong time of their lives in one room and put them in a big room together for 72 hours straight with a video camera pointed on them - now THAT'S ENTERTAINMENT!
 

LaBettyBoop

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lol...............lol......................This is very interesting. I laugh NOT at the "thread" but the fact that there is so much to say about these "type" of women.

I'm a married woman, as many of you already know, and I don't tolerate that bullsh*t from any "chicken head". I can't call them women because if they were women, they would have respect. Especially when those "types" know that the man is married and know to WHO.

Good subject! ;)
 

MS KENNY GUIDO

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LaBettyBoop said:
lol...............lol......................This is very interesting. I laugh NOT at the "thread" but the fact that there is so much to say about these "type" of women.
I'm a married woman, as many of you already know, and I don't tolerate that bullsh*t from any "chicken head". I can't call them women because if they were women, they would have respect. Especially when those "types" know that the man is married and know to WHO.
Good subject! ;)
Exactly! Some day they will do it to the wrong woman and get a stiletto stuck upside their head! lol:eek:
 

xXTheORIGINATORxX

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MS KENNY GUIDO said:
Where is Originator? No comment??? Could this be??? LOL

Be what??? And how did you know I was reading this??? lol

I don't think it's cool neither. Like you said, especially when they know to who the person they married to is. Cuz I wouldn't want any dude to be hitting on my would be other-half. I'd knock the shit out of 'em. That's if he knew that my girl is with me!! I seriously don't know how you girls let this slide. BUT, I would be sure that this wouldn't be a problem because my future girl wouldn't tolerate that (being hit on). Remember, it takes two to tango.

On another note, there are those wives and girlfriends that just get things twisted (like Toni mentioned earlier) and get carried away and think that a simple conversation between a committed guy and another single girl can mean that she is hitting on him. So then the real problem is really the girlfriend or wife and not the other girl. Also remember, TRUST must always be there and is very important.
 
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LaBettyBoop

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Well on another note..............those "hitters" won't get anywhere if the spouse, significant other, etc. don't allow it to happen. Right?

Because there are married women out there that like the attention from another man and provoke them too with "flirty looks", "smiles", "body language". So it's a "vice versa" kind of thing here. It could be a man out there hitting on the married woman while she's out with her husband somewhere. Hmmmmmmmmm.............my hubby would "bust some ass" for sure. lol.........lol.........
 

mrsjinx

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EYE Yey jeye!!!! :(
i don't like DIRTY PEOPLE-
NO COMMENT
 
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xXTheORIGINATORxX

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LaBettyBoop said:
Well on another note..............those "hitters" won't get anywhere if the spouse, significant other, etc. don't allow it to happen. Right?

That's exactly my point.
 
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