I Am So Confused

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LocaBoriquaQueen

LocaBoriquaQueen

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Freestyle is the life.. We keep it alive!! Jersey
I have been dating this guy for quite some time now. Well when we first started talking he told me that he had a son. At first I kind of hesitated because of the issue of the "baby's mom" will always some how be connected to him for life. Well I tried to give it a try because it felt right being with him. Well me and him connected and I eventually connected well with his son too. I actually fell in love with him and his adorable son. We thought nothing could come between us. Well then I started working different hours because I was going to college and his hours changed too because he was now working at a new job. Well between me going to school and working all week (no weekends off) and him working too it was a bit overwhelming that for the first time we could not see each other as much as we wanted too. Well we did break up for two months but still continued to see each other and spend as much time as we could with each other. So basically nothing changed except for the title (boy/girl friend). His birthday is 6 days away from mine. His baby's mom on my birthday decided to talk tohim and see if they could "work" things out for the baby. He told me about it and stated that he wanted to give it one more try and if that did not work out he would want to be with me. I did tell him that this is hurting me and this is the reason why I was skeptical about dating him. Now he is confusing me bc he tells me he loves me he calls me everyday, he addresses me as his girl, and he tells me over and over that he is only doing this for the baby. I just dont know what to tell him or how to tell him about how I feel. I am hurt and lost and dont know what to do. I am still trying to figure out what went wrong? Can someone please help me and give me advice as to what to do. I am in love with him and it is so hard to let go. I dont even know that I should at least be friends with him right now. I am so Confused. :crap
 
you have to give him a ultimatum. either he leaves you alone and does the family thing or if he wants to be with you he has to leave the wife. you shoulndt mess with a man who's with his baby's mom. you deserve to have a guy to yourself.
 
If you don't let go, you'll never move on. as much as it hurts to know, if he wanted to be with you, he would. If you truly love someone, you ,make it work, no real man would use his son as an excuse. You seem like a wonderful caring person, so find someone that aprreciates that in you and desreves you. he doesn't and you'll be happier with someone who does, no matter how hard that seems to do right now. 2 years from now you'll say "DAMN, SCOTMAN was right, wha was I thinking!!!! good luck!
 
When they do it for the kids- it never works out and they're never really happy...

Mama I say move on- there are plenty of single men w/o kids who can treat u like the Queen/Princess u are!!
 
Well mama am in there shoes I have a kid and not with the real father and to tell you the truth if he going to try for the baby is not going to work out for the fact that they are not going to be happy and if he telling you that he loves you then you have to let him know how you feel tell him at it is ... Do not be scared trust me it will be the best thing you do if you want to keep him you have to let him know how you feel ....

But if he doing it for the kid is not going to work out ask him if he still have feelings for her ? Ask him all you thinking about now cuz I know you have alot of question for him I would be too trust me .. Just get all your feelings out is something that is hard I know that but at the end you feel some what better cuz you wont be thinking what if or if I would of you know how that goes ...

Mama if you want to chat some time or anything just aim me or email me at shorty38825@aol.com or aim me at shorty38825

Hope that everything goes good for you no matter what you have us here to talk too and get all your thoughts out ma .....

much love sorry to hear about this ..This will get better !
 
Honey, move on. Sorry to hear of your heartache, but I would never want to be some baby's momma's understudy :smirk
 
I say right now he is not being considerate as 2 how u feel and 2 me right now all u are 2 him is a booty call or something 2 fall back on IF this does'nt work out so basically in a way he's using u. If I was u I would move on(no matter how hard it is) and find TRUE happiness from someone that can give u the love and affection that u truly deserve. I mean what if he says it did'nt work and u take him back again and he does it again after u forgave him and took him back. Then u would be heartbroken all over again....good luck in whatever decision u make
 
oh wow... he definately doesn't deserve you... i mean it's one thing taking care of his child, but that's another thing playing both fields... he wants to be with his child and his mother... yet he tells you he loves you... he's lying to one of you for whatever reason...
he doesn't needto be with his baby's mother to be able to take care of his kid... many fahters do that...

think about this.. it's not worth your time cos at the end of the night you'll be crying yourself to sleep.
 
Thank all of you for your great advice. I know it will be hard but of coarse I am a woman who is strong and independent but slightly blinded by love. I am definately going to move on and although I might not get inot a relationship with some one right now I am still going to have fun seeing other people and testing the waters. I greatly appreciate the advice that each and every one of you has given to me. I am definately going to take the advice. I wish as everyone else probably does that we already knew who we are going to spend the rest of our lives with. That way we dont have to go through this BullS**t , but I guess if it was that way we would never learn and be naive. Well once again thank you and I will keep yall posted on more information. Love Yall!!
 
LocaBoriquaQueen said:
I have been dating this guy for quite some time now. Well when we first started talking he told me that he had a son. At first I kind of hesitated because of the issue of the "baby's mom" will always some how be connected to him for life. Well I tried to give it a try because it felt right being with him. Well me and him connected and I eventually connected well with his son too. I actually fell in love with him and his adorable son. We thought nothing could come between us. Well then I started working different hours because I was going to college and his hours changed too because he was now working at a new job. Well between me going to school and working all week (no weekends off) and him working too it was a bit overwhelming that for the first time we could not see each other as much as we wanted too. Well we did break up for two months but still continued to see each other and spend as much time as we could with each other. So basically nothing changed except for the title (boy/girl friend). His birthday is 6 days away from mine. His baby's mom on my birthday decided to talk tohim and see if they could "work" things out for the baby. He told me about it and stated that he wanted to give it one more try and if that did not work out he would want to be with me. I did tell him that this is hurting me and this is the reason why I was skeptical about dating him. Now he is confusing me bc he tells me he loves me he calls me everyday, he addresses me as his girl, and he tells me over and over that he is only doing this for the baby. I just dont know what to tell him or how to tell him about how I feel. I am hurt and lost and dont know what to do. I am still trying to figure out what went wrong? Can someone please help me and give me advice as to what to do. I am in love with him and it is so hard to let go. I dont even know that I should at least be friends with him right now. I am so Confused. :crap
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YOU NEED TO LET HIM GO MAMA. YOU WILL FIND THE PERFECT GUY WITHIN TIME BELIEVE ME. MUAHZ!!!!!!!!!!
 
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