First Love Dilemma

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marilisa

marilisa

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I told my friend that I would post this for her to see what you guys thought. Ok my good friend was involved with this guy about 10 years ago and they really never got any closure. He was her first real love and she took his virginity. Well when he went to the service she was a lil hot ass and could not wait for him so she started seeing another guy whom was a looser and is now her babys father. Anyhow her first love has now married and moved to Long Beach CA and is a police officer out there. She does not want to ruin his marriage but she wants closure and she wants to tell him that she still and will always love him and that she was sorry for the breakup. She sent him flowers last year on his b-day and he did not call her back. Well she tells me all the time how she wants just to hear his voice and tell him that he will always be in her heart. She has a boyfriend now and she does not seem to be happy with him. So she tracked his number down and called the station on Monday left a message and she has not heard anything yet. She does not want to ruin his marriage all she wants is to get closure. What is your advice? What should she do? I told her to just be happy for him and to move on and that she should just treasure the memories they had. And to look on the bright side that she is nows someone now that loves her.
 
Looks like she is being ignored and for good reason he's moved on. I think she should do the same.

You live and learn from your mistakes thats how it is.
 
Sometimes we can't get closure... cruel, but true. She should just leave it alone. She says she doesn't want to ruin his marriage, but considering that she is not happy with her present relationship, I think deep down she is hoping he will reciprocate her feelings, to get back what she feels she lost. Time has a way of changing people.. he may not be the same person he was back then, which is obvious in his not responding to her. That old saying you don't know what you have till you've lost it, applies here. Unfortunately, he wants to stay lost to her. Your advice to her was right on Marilisa.. she should treasure the memories and let it go....
 
yeah I agree, just leave it alone. unfortunately Karma is a real bitch and well what goes around comes around, she hurt him therefore now he wants nothing to do w/ her. not really much else she can do but just move on...
 
marilisa said:
I told my friend that I would post this for her to see what you guys thought. Ok my good friend was involved with this guy about 10 years ago and they really never got any closure. He was her first real love and she took his virginity. Well when he went to the service she was a lil hot ass and could not wait for him so she started seeing another guy whom was a looser and is now her babys father. Anyhow her first love has now married and moved to Long Beach CA and is a police officer out there. She does not want to ruin his marriage but she wants closure and she wants to tell him that she still and will always love him and that she was sorry for the breakup. She sent him flowers last year on his b-day and he did not call her back. Well she tells me all the time how she wants just to hear his voice and tell him that he will always be in her heart. She has a boyfriend now and she does not seem to be happy with him. So she tracked his number down and called the station on Monday left a message and she has not heard anything yet. She does not want to ruin his marriage all she wants is to get closure. What is your advice? What should she do? I told her to just be happy for him and to move on and that she should just treasure the memories they had. And to look on the bright side that she is nows someone now that loves her.
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DUDE SHE SOUNDS LIKE A STALKER TELL HER TO LEAVE HIM ALONE NOW HE OBVIOUSLY DOES NOT WANT TO TALK TO HER ANYMORE TELL HER TO LET IT GO!!!
 
When and if the time is right, she will get the closure she needs......It took me and my "first love" almost 10 years to get that closure.....we just recently were able to sit down and talk everything over. Unfortunately thats how life goes.....

She has done what she can to reach out to him, but she needs to realize that that is all she should do....to continue to try to pursue getting in touch with him may have dire consequences.....I did not speak with my ex until I was ready.....and if he would have pushed, I may not have ever done so......albeit he did use a sneaky way to finally get my attention, but at that point I was finally ready to have that chat with him.....I wish your friend the best of luck.....just tell her to let fate take its course.....
if its meant to be, it will be......
 
She should stop trying to contact him. If he really wanted to talk to her about what happen in their past then he will go out of his way to contact her. He has someone else and she should respect that and move on. Your friend is also in a relationship with someone and she should not put the guy she is dating through all this because it is not fair to him or her ex's woman. If she is not happy with her boyfriend she should not stay with him. I understand she wants to contact him to let him know and I know its extremely hard when you try and do not hear from that other person because I have been there but there comes a time where you have to accept it and move on because not all people handle situations in life the same. There are some people who would rather never communicate with an ex ever again whether the break up was good or bad. She did her part and she tried to contact him so there is nothing else for her to do. If he wants to speak to her he will go out of his way to do so and if not then it was not meant to be. I wish her luck.
 
I believe it can't get any clearer, it's a wrap.
She need to move on, & deal with the consecuences, she brought it on herself.
 
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