blonde

Guy gets on a plane and finds himself seated next to a cute blonde. He immediately turns to her and makes his move. "You know," he says, "I've heard that flights will go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger. So let's talk." The blonde, who had just opened her book...

A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no prior experience. She mounts the horse, unassisted, and the horse immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the...

What do you call a blode with a brain? A Golden Retrevier!

Blonde Painter A blonde, wanting to earn some extra money, decided to hire herself out as a "handy-woman" and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do. "Well, I guess I could use...

A blonde woman is driving down the road. She notices that she's low on gas, so she stops at a gas station. While she's pumping her gas, she notices that she locked the keys in the car. So when she goes inside to pay, she asks the attendant for a hanger so that she can attempt to open the door...

This blonde decides one day that she is sick and tired of all these blonde jokes and how all blondes are perceived as stupid, so she decides to show her husband that blondes really are smart. While her husband is off at work, she decides that she is going to paint a couple of rooms in the house...

Why was the blonde upset when she got her Driver's License? Because she got an "F" in sex. Why can't a blonde dial 911? She can't find the eleven. How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday? Tell her a joke on Wednesday.

Why did the blonde put condoms on her ears before Sex??? So she wouldnt get hearing AIDS.

A blonde went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain. "I would like to buy this TV," she told the salesman. "Sorry we don't sell to blondes," he replied. She hurried home, dyed her hair, came back again and told the salesman, "I would like to buy this TV." "Sorry we don't sell to...

A blonde and a brunette were watching the 11:00 news. The current news story was about a man up on a ledge and threatening to jump. The station cuts to a commercial. Brunette: I bet you $20 he's going to jump. Blonde: OK. (back to newscast) He jumps. Blonde: OK Here's my $20. Brunette: No, that...

Two factory workers were talking. "I think I'll take some time off from work," said the man. "How do you think you'll do that?" said the blonde. He proceeded to show her...by climbing up to the rafters, and hanging upside down. The boss walked in, saw the worker hanging from the ceiling, and...

Where are on a blonde will you find black curly hair???? . . . . . . . . . . . . In between her teeth!!!!!!!!!!!

Help me!! I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started." Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?" The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger." Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She...

AUTO REPAIR A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it's idling smoothly. She says, "What's the story?" He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor." She asks, "How often do I have to do that?" EXPOSURE A...

FIRST DEGREE A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning. The wife (undoubtedly blonde), picked up the phone, listened a moment and said, "How should I know, that's 200 miles from here!" and hung up. The husband said, "Who was that?" The wife said, "I don't know, some...

All you can eat for under a dollar. LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

Has anybody seen Legally Blonde 2? Just came back from seeing...I thought it was about one of the stupidest movies I have seen in ages. The first one was kinda cute...this was just plain old BAD!!!:blah

THIS JOKE WAS SENT TO ME BY MY SISTA NANCY(KALU528)...IT MAY HAVE BEEN POSTED BEFORE BUT I'LL PUT IT UP ANYWAY... A MAN WAS IN HIS FRONT YARD MOWING GRASS...WHEN THIS ATTRACTIVE BLONDE FEMALE NEIGHBOR CAME OUT OF HER HOUSE...AND WENT STRAIGHT FOR THE MAILBOX, OPENED IT AND SLAMMED IT SHUT THEN...

There was a woman who wanted to repaint her house, so she called the contractor and set an appointment to meet with him. When the contractor came to her house they did a walk-through and he asked her what colors she would like. They came to the living room and she told him that she would like a...

A white guy is walking along a beach when he comes across a lamp partially buried in the sand. He picks up the lamp and gives it a rub. Two blonde genies appear, and they tell him he has been granted three wishes. The guy makes his three wishes and the blonde genies disappear. The next thing the...